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Seems that I’m trying to force myself to think about the topics of the speaking club more than necessary. On the one hand, I know that it provides me with a better understanding of the topics; but on the other hand, I feel a sort of frustration. There must be another way to improve the quality of the discussions. Maybe, I shouldn’t write every day about the topics, doing it only when I have a desire for it. I certainly don’t like it when my writing turns into hollow word-structures. But I know that there is no other way to make it strong and meaningful without regular practice, and I can’t endure practicing regularly when it doesn’t make a lot of sense, etc., etc. Thus, to make it better I have to spend more time thinking about the subject, but the more I think, the more I hate it. What if it’s just the nature of this particular subject? I can’t say that it was hard for me to think about wisdom. The concept of justice makes very little sense if one is a determinist. Maybe, I just don’t write about what I’m really thinking? Instead, I’m mixing up various common prejudices related to justice, and that’s why I don’t like it. Yep, I don’t write about what I’m thinking! I’m searching for something that is supposed to be useful for discussion, though my real inclination is to attack the conventional concept of justice. I wouldn’t argue that there is no such thing as justice in the warld, but rather that the concept itself is quite ambiguous and, ultimately, meaningless. This is how justice appears from the natural law’s point of view.
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