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How can I improve my relationship with A right now? I like the idea of collecting her statements. Yesterday, she was gentle, cute and loving for the entire day. She said many pleasing things like: I’m so happy with you. I was too lucky to meet you. I wanna be closer to you. I love you. I love you. I love you…
She also said she wanted to do something for me, but she didn’t know what. She complained that I didn’t need anything. I responded that I needed her, adding that it would be great if she read my works, as well as the authors who had a serious impact on me. Her answer was that she didn’t understand why I needed that and how it would help me. I tried to explain, but she got sleepy and I gave up. Actually, I think I made a mistake trying to explain it. Isn’t it obvious? You wanna know what I need, read my stuff and find the answer. Anyway—
What can I improve in my relationship? More days like that? Building a strong connection? Being less childish? Never stop working on the improvement?
I need to invest more attention in self-control. When she behaves like a child, it’s almost impossible to preserve a rational conduct. And yet, I can do that. The end of this beautiful day, yesterday, was quite unpredictable. After having sex, she started crying. At first, I thought it was the tears of happiness, but then she told me that she still thinks about her ex and can’t let go whatever binds her to him. She said that something held her back, preventing her from being with me 100%. I took no offense in it, but my sleep was disturbed. Perhaps, it’s just a silly dream to make one out of two.
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