12695
Missed one day. Things are getting weirder. When I came to her on Sunday, we didn’t have any conflict, but there was a feeling of mutual contempt. She wanted to make video lessons and asked me to build a glass-board for that purpose. I didn’t want to build it, but said I’ll do it later. Later I started asking her about where to order a certain type of glass, what the size of the board she needed was, etc. She got upset, and we stopped talking. The morning was awful, and besides, she said during the night that she’ll ask her ex to build the board. I was furious, thinking that we’re gonna break up very soon. My mind generated a countless number of ways to end up our relationship; I was almost 100% certain that if she’s not pregnant, I’ll implement one or another of them. However, when I got home, I quickly changed my mind. The rest of the day was amazing. She said so many nice things: “Nobody could have tolerated her, but me. She appreciates so much that I don’t do stupid things when she gets angry and behaves like a bitch. Her love is infinite, etc.”
She doesn’t know why she gets peevish so often. We tried to discuss it. When I behave like a child, or mock her, or try to please her when she get angry, it makes her even more angry.
Anyway. Seems I have no desire to write today.
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