Дело на одну трубку

- Very well, Mrs. Brown. We are investigating a very important case. We would like you to give us evidence.
- Oh, certainly. I will be very glad to help you. I have never been a witness before. It must be so exciting!
- There is no doubt about it, Mrs. Brown.
- You know, mister inspector, a friend of mine was invited to court one day to give evidence. She then shared the experience with me. You know, it makes you feel such an important person. So, my friend …
- Hold on, Mrs. Brown. Let’s get down to business, we are short of time. We still have your neighbors to collect evidence from.
- Oh, they aren’t going to tell you anything. These people are indifferent and dull. They don’t want to know or see anything except for their work and children.
- OK, Mrs. Brown, we’ll keep that in mind. My first question is this: were you at home from 9 to 11 o’clock yesterday morning?
- I should think so. I am not sure about the time. I had so many things to do!
- So, what were you doing at that time?
- Well, I was taking shower, doing the make-up, watching TV, the usual things.
- I see, I see. I would like to find out if you saw something suspicious
- You mean, on TV?
- No, in the yard, outside.
- I am not sure. I am not in the habit of staring out the window without any reason.
- Are you sure you didn’t see anything?
- Oh, no, you know, I saw my neighbor go out of the house with a big heavy bag. The bag was so heavy that he could hardly carry it. He usually goes to work at this time, so I always see him going out. He doesn’t carry anything but his briefcase.
- Well, come on, go ahead. All that is very interesting.
- Really? Then, are you going to invite me to court as a witness?
- By all means. So what happened next?
- Then I saw him load the bag into the boot of his car and leave. But he made his way back in about 10-15 minutes, and I noticed him entering the house without the bag. It is very suspicious, isn’t it?
- Sure thing.
- I didn’t expect my neighbor to be such a scoundrel. He must have committed a crime!

- Well, what do you say to this, Mr. Lestrade?
- What do you want me to say? Everything is as clear as day. Let’s go to that neighbor right away to arrest him on suspicion of murder.
- Don’t hurry, inspector. First, do you believe that woman is telling the truth?
- I don’t doubt it. Why should she deceive us?
- Maybe just because she want to feel important. And, second, even if what she is saying is true, you still have to collect some reliable evidence before you go to arrest anybody.
- You are always making things too complicated, Mr. Holmes!
- Nothing of the kind. It is just that I want to catch the criminals red-handed. We need to pretend that we don’t know anything, and watch the house. The criminal may have accomplices.
- Look here, Holmes! If we drag our feet, the criminals will escape, and then we won’t get anybody. But if we arrest the suspect, we are going to give him a good interrogation, and he will tell us everything himself.
- This is out of question, Lestrade. I wonder, who picked up these coarse manners from? The British justice is being guided by the presumption of innocence. If you presume that a person is guilty, you must first prove it. Otherwise, you may arrest an innocent person, and then you will become a criminal yourself.

- And now let’s see what Mrs. Granger has to tell us.
- Do you mean the other neighbor?
- Right. The one who was the first to call the police. Perhaps, she will be our main witness.
- Who is there?
- Police. Good afternoon, Mrs. Granger. My name is Robert Lestrade, and this is Sherlock Holmes, my partner. We often work together.
- Pleased to meet you. Nice to meet you, Mr. Lestrade. How do you do, Mr. Holmes?
- How do you do? Nice to meet you.
- May I offer you a cup of coffee?
- I wouldn't mind. It is dog cold outside today. But let’s get down to business. First of all, let me thank you for your cooperation and vigilance. If all citizens behaved like you do, we would have long done away with crime. Thanks for your call.
-Every decent person would have acted in the same way. Their house id quite close to mine, so I heard everything.
- Let’s start from the very beginning. And please speak more slowly, if you would. I am trying to take notes.
- OK. Here is what happened. In fact, I have known Mr. Richardson and his wife since long ago. I mean, as my neighbors. We say hello to each other. We are on good terms – have always been, since the very moment they moved in here.
- And when was it?
- About two years ago, I don’t remember exactly – something like that. They have been quarrelling a lot lately, shouted at each other. But the day before yesterday something awful happened. That was a terrible scene. I had my kitchen window open, just to let some fresh air in. I was making an apple pie. You know, my husband, he is crazy about such pies. Would you like me to treat you to my pie? I bet you have never tasted anything like that in your life!
- No, thank you, Mrs. Granger, we have just had lunch. You can leave this pie for your husband. So what happened next?
- Henry’s wife started screaming at the top of her voice, then I heard something crashing, as if someone were breaking furniture.
- Why didn’t you call us straight away instead of calling only the following morning?
- Well, I didn’t want to interfere with their private life. People have the right to do whatever they please when at home. But then the screams suddenly stopped, something dropped with a bang, and then there was silence. I even had creeps all over my spine.
- But you haven't seen anything?
- No, nothing at all. Firstly, I am shortsighted. And secondly, they have got so many flowers in the windows that you wouldn’t really see what is going on inside. But when I saw Henry start his car and leave for work alone the next morning, I smelled a rat. It was unusually quiet. So you understand that I could not but call you then. I haven’t seen Mary since.
- Are theirs the windows across the street?
- Yes, Mr. Lestrade. You are quite right.
- I can’t really see a lot of flowers there. I can only see two or three flower pots in each window.
- That is really strange, Mr. Lestrade. Mary is .. err..was very fond of flowers.
- This has nothing to do with the case, anyway. Thank you very much, Mrs. Granger. I appreciate your help.
- Let me ask you one more question.
- Yes, certainly, Mr. Holmes.
- What do your neighbors do for a living?
- Oh, I won’t make a mistake here – they are both real estate brokers. They are in real estate business. It is because of these realtors that prices of housing in London have gone up so much!
- Thank you, that’s all I want to know. Good-bye.


- Well, what did I tell you, Holmes? I said straight away that it was no other than Richardson who had killed his wife. They had a quarrel, then he got angry, and he hit her with something heavy – maybe, on the head. Maybe, he didn’t want to kill her, and it was an accident. Then he got scared and decided to hide up the crime. Of course, first thing he had to get rid of the body. He packed it into a big bag and took it away somewhere. He may have dropped it into the Thames. It makes just five or seven minutes’ drive from here. Mr. Brown saw it all. Even her, she understood everything at once. The only thing that we have to do is to arrest the criminal so that he tells us where he disposed of the body.
- If I were you, I wouldn’t jump to premature conclusions. The case is not at all as evident as you may think it to be.
- I don’t know how about you, Mr. Holmes, but for me the case is as clear as day. When do you want us to visit the Richardsons?
- Let’s go to his place tomorrow morning.
- Why tomorrow? Don’t you know the saying: Don’t put off till tomorrow what you can do today?
- That's a good saying, Lestrade, but it is out of place here.
- I respect your talents, Holmes, but if the criminal escapes, you will be the one to blame.
- All right, Lestrade, I am ready to assume the responsibility entirely. I still have to think something over and make a few phone calls. Besides, I would like to examine the parking space where Richardson usually keeps his car. It won’t take long. As you can see, Richardson is a typical clerk, so I don’t think he is going to give up his work and his house. Even because he is sure that nobody knows anything.
- Why do you think so?
- I can judge by his behavior. He keeps going to work. If he wanted to escape, he would have already escaped.

- Good morning, Mr. Lestrade.
- Good morning, Mr. Holmes. You are being very punctual, as usual. It’s 9 sharp now.
- Didn’t we agree to meet at 9? Richardson leaves for work at half past nine, so we should have about twenty minutes for a talk.
- For a talk? What are you talking about? This man is likely to spend the next twenty years of his life in prison, unless he gets a life-time. He will have to forget about his work now.
- Why have you taken it into your head that Henry had killed his wife? Have you seen it with your own eyes?
- Of course not, but I have got the witnesses’ evidence. I can’t help being surprised with you, old man. You have investigated hundreds of cases, and now you refuse to see the most simple cause-and-effect connections. As a representative of official authorities, I wish you wouldn’t hinder execution of the justice. I am going to interrogate the suspect myself now, and you will see that there are no doubts that he is the murderer.
- OK, Lestrade, although you will have to change your mind within fifteen minutes. I wish you hadn’t brought these two constables with you. There won’t be any work for them this time.

- Good morning, Mr. Richardson.
- Доброе утро. What can I do for you? I haven’ t called the police.
- Inspector Lestrsade. My pleasure. It was Mrs. Granger, your neighbor, who called the police. And Mrs. Brown, your other neighbor, has seen you loading your wife’s body into the boot. Would you be so kind as to tell us and show where you disposed of it?
- What the hell are you saying! I haven’t killed anybody.
- Come on, stop telling me the tales. I have been with the police for twenty years now, but never once did I see a criminal who would confess a murder on a free will. But, as they say, facts speak louder than words. Mrs. Granger heard you having a row with your wife two days ago. She also heard you hitting her with something heavy, causing her to stop short.
-  Yes, we did have a quarrel, I can’t deny it. But I am giving you my word of horror that didn’t even touch her.
- Come on, Mr. Richardson. You must have lost your temper and killed her accidentally. This is exactly how murders usually occur. If you own up and be cooperative, you won’t get a life-time.
- She just slammed the door and left.
- She left? Undressed, without luggage? Do you expect me to believe you?
- Mary loses her temper quite easily. She has left me several times by now, but she always came back. She must have run to complain to her mother again what a scoundrel I am.
The doorbell rings.
- You see, inspector, she is back.
- Henry, what is happening here? What are all these people doing here? I hope, you haven’t done anything wrong?
- Please, Mary, meet inspector Lestrade. You won’t believe it, but he was about to arrest me for my having killed you.
- You almost killed me, I do feel completely destroyed. I can’t live without you. Please forgive me if I said something offensive. But let bygones be bygones. Oh, by the way, what have you done with all my begonias?
- I have thrown them away. I thought that as long as you left for good, I could afford to get rid of them. I have no time to look after so many flowers!

- Well, what do you say to this now, my friend?
- It's incredible! I knew you were capable of many things, but I had no idea you were the devil himself! I still cannot figure out how you guessed that Henry was innocent. I must apologize.
- Never mind, Lestrade. You were acting the way a police inspector was supposed to. If it had not been for you, I could have made a mistake, too.
- But how did you manage to guess that there was no Mrs. Richardson’s body in the bag?
- It was all very simple. You gave me the clue yourself when you paid your attention to the fact that there had been very few flowers in the windows left. Only you said it had nothing to do with the case. But at that specific moment it dawned at me why the Richardsons had made a family scene. The only thing I had to do was to find out the occupations of Mr. and Mrs. Richardson. It only took one minute.
Do you remember Mrs. Granger saying that Mary had so many flowers you couldn’t see inside? Where could all these flowers have gone to just within a couple of days? I asked myself that simple question and realized that Mr. Richardson must have got rid of them. A person who works as a realtor doesn’t keep anything heavy in his house. His tools are his head, experience, phone and documents. Hence, there was flower ground and, possibly, flower pots in the bag. These are all rather heavy things. Having carefully examined the parking spot, I made it sure that my hypothesis had been correct. The next question I had to face was why Henry sent them to the dump-site right after the scene with his wife? There could be the only answer to this – he had become fed up with them. And it was exactly the reason why he had a quarrel with his wife. Me. I love flowers too, but I only keep those that do not require complicated care. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have time to investigate my cases. Plus, I can afford paying Mrs. Hadson, my maid for her help around the house. Mary had no helpers, so she had to do everything herself. No wonder that her husband was cross with her, because after her work she didn’t have time to do anything else but look after her flowers. She must have been paying less attention to him than to her flowers.
- Unbelievable. And how simple! I can’t understand how I could have overlooked this. But now that you’ve explained everything to me, things come to their proper places. But how the hell could you know the time when Mary would come back right when we were there to arrest Mr. Henry?
- I coordinated that with her myself. Don’t forget that there is a phone-book in the city, so I had no trouble finding the phone number of Mary’s mother there. Of course, first I made sure that it would be the very Mary Richardson I was looking for, which took me a few phone calls. This is a very common name. But there were only four Mary Richardsons among realtors, so, based on the address, I found her with the second phone call. I had a quiet talk with her, and it wasn’t a problem for me to persuade her to come back to her husband. Even because that was her own intention. That's all there is to it, my dear Lestrade. That’s what I call a “one pipe case”.