A Trap for a Thought-Form. 24. Dream Level

A TRAP for a THOUGHT-FORM

a novel in the series
"PLAYING ANOTHER REALITY"

Chapter 24. DREAM LEVEL

I woke up in the morning and thought, “Maybe the books I make presentations of in the Mansion don’t yet exist in the real world? And their authors? Do they exist?”

However, I dug up every book on the Internet. I read their annotations, they were exactly the same, and the authors were the same. Not a big, but still a chance that I existed, too.

Having thrown on my furs, I went out into the Blizzard.

“Why didn’t I go for a walk before? Was it also someone’s program, installed in my Consciousness and keeping me within just two spaces, my flat and the Mansion?”

Wandering the lonely lanes, I tried to look at myself through the eyes of the Guardian, Roman, Pasha, the King of Swords and the Wanderer, addressing myself on behalf of each of them and reliving everything anew, in a circle, in a circle, in a circle, in the Blizzard that would never end…

***

“What’s your dream, Alice?” asked the Guardian, greeting me at the entrance to the Mansion. “Yesterday there were ‘The Golden Balls’ by Koschey, and today we have ‘At the Dream Level’ by the Last Romantic. What kind of level is that? Has the author nothing to do with magic? Then why does he come here? So what’s your dream?”

“To find the Portal and get out of here,” I said coldly.


Suddenly, I realized where the Portal was! “Hot” meant the FIREPLACE!!! “Thank you, Guardian!”

The Guardian grinned — could he read minds, indeed? — and gestured to proceed to the fireplace room. I walked up to the fireplace — yes, “hot” was there.

“WHAT IS THERE? What do you think?” glancing at the Portal, asked the Guardian, as he approached me.

“LOVE,” I answered without hesitation.

My answer infuriated the Guardian. Turning purple and clenching his fingers into a fist, he struck the fireplace with a mighty blow.

“DEATH!” he shouted and abruptly pushed me out of the room.

***

While the guests were discussing with the author the varieties of dreams and ways to materialize them, my Consciousness was agonizing in search of evidence from the contrary to make sure that I was not a ghost.

“Can a ghost have dreams?” I pondered. “For example, a dream to create his own world, where there would be a place for mutual Love? To create it in the Future, while in reality you have already everything exclusively in the Past.”

“The path is endless, Alice,” Roman’s voice was heard in response.

“Even for a ghost?”

“Yes…”

During the break, as usual — was it a program, too? — I made coffee for Roman and sat down at our table.

“Have you walked in others’ shoes, I mean others’ worlds?” Roman asked, remembering yesterday’s task.

“Yes, in the Blizzard,” I answered. (“Swirling in it, I looked at myself through your eyes, and I felt terribly uncomfortable for myself. But if I am not myself, I’ll have to be someone else, and I don’t want that.”) “And then I found the Portal here,” I continued mentally and officially again. “It’s the fireplace. I don’t really understand how it works. And why do I feel it in two rooms at once? It should be in one of them only.” (“It’s much easier for you, Roman, to look at yourself through my eyes, because you read all my thoughts, and I don’t read yours.”) “The Guardian said that Death defeated Love,” I sighed. (“Do you know why I can’t read your mind as you read mine?”)

“Why?” Roman asked silently.

“The Guardian is afraid of Love. Afraid to love someone, because he is afraid of being rejected. He puts a huge and fat cross on Love beforehand. He buries Love. Kills it in himself. And denies its existence.” (“Because I’m like the Guardian, Roman. It’s easier and safer to remain at the level of a dream than trying to realize the dream. Fear is one of the programs installed in us as a self-preservation instinct. And this program will survive all the others.”)

The Guardian came up to our table, as if he felt me talking about him. He rang the bell theatrically and with a sweet smile.

“Did we get to the fears today?” Roman asked out loud.

“No. We’ve three ‘step aside’ tasks. Yesterday was the first one.”

Task No. 24. STEP ASIDE No. 2

…The second task of the three steps aside is to step mentally into the Ball of a Third Person and look at the situation between you and the person close to you: first, at what is happening in general, second, at the person close to you, and then, at yourself — from the point of view of the Third Person, from his world, with his eyes and try to feel what he feels, looking at you and the person close to you and at your situation in general…

***

I came home, lit the candles and called…

“Wanderer…”

“I was at the Mysteries in Ancient Egypt yesterday!”

“Cool! Back to the Past? Can you travel through the Time?”

“Time is one of the axes of our space’s coordinates.”

“I wanted to torture you a little more about…”

“Glitches in the Matrix?”

“Yes… Why do I have gaps in my memory? Almost everything is erased. Entire layers. And little things as well. I don’t remember what I eat, if I eat at all. I don’t remember weekends. I don’t remember the way I come back home from the Mansion. It even seemed to me once that I instantly transgressed as soon as I took a couple of steps from the Mansion into the Blizzard. Perhaps I am a ghost after all. You just don’t want to scare me, do you? As for ghosts, this phenomenon is normal. The ghost is gradually freed from the memory of the incarnation, clinging to the most precious things, while being clung by the unfinished ones.”

“Alice djan… Many people suffer from memory lapses! You’re just still very young, so you haven’t faced such a phenomenon! The Consciousness of any person is not able to keep afloat the giant layers of information, falling upon it like an avalanche! Therefore, due to the instinct of self-preservation, Consciousness filters information and divides it into critically important and the other, putting the latter on the mezzanine! Stressed people forget their names, and you still respond to yours! Everything is just fine with you!!!”