Sad Buddhist and Karma

- Dear friend, if you are interested in psychology, and philosophy try to learn Buddhism. I am  from Sri Lanka.

-Hello! Why I should learn Buddhism and not other things?

- Because I have seen on your profile you are interested in philosophy and psychology. Christianity, Hinduism etc.. are religions. Buddhism is not a religion, it's a philosophy. That's why I said to learn or read about Buddhism.
But only intelligent people could understand that. It will help you to understand about the universe and about yourself. How it works.

-OK, but not only Buddhism explains about Universe-there are many theories exist and all have their own vision

-No, that is not true. Even if there is some, they are not proper. Only the Lord buddha explain everything properly, don't misunderstand me. I don't want to promote the Buddhism. haven't you seen many European and western people have become as Buddhist monks. They all are highly educated and did professional jobs when they were as normal people. None of the religious leaders explained about the karma or fate. Christians use to say when good things are happening " thanks God ". and when bad things are happening they use to say " its God's wish ". Only the Lord buddha said if you done a good thing you will get a good result according to that. If you done a bad thing you will get a bad result. if you plant a mango seed you will get a mango tree, not a coconut tree.in this life we are paying for what we have done in our past birth. there is a natural law is  activating with our knowledge, that is called in pali language " karma ".in English " fate ".

- So, if a person experiences difficulties in life it means he did bad things in previous life times? That one? Karma?

-You are totally correct, yes , nothing is happening randomly, everything has a reason. Even if you meet an enemy or a friend in this life there is a reason. Karma means the results of either good or bad things. For an example, in one family you can see different children. Some are healthy, some are disabled, some are educated, some are not, some are rich and some are poor, etc. Those things are happening according to the karma or fate which have they done in there past births

-You have proof of that statement?

- I think you have heard these things for the first time. But fortunately there is everything in the internet now. Don't misunderstand the whole thing is happening according the karma or fate, but more than 90 because of that. You know some families are there the enemies within the family itself. Husband kills wife, wife kills husband, parents kill children, children kill parents. I have seen enough of documentaries in the internet. Some are unbelievable. Those things are the real karma. Anyway I am happy that you are interested in intelligence things and I hope as you said in your profile you are an educated woman.

 I have seen your country, it's very beautiful. In which part you living there. Still I see only a natural photo on your profile. Why don't you upload a photo of you. In this life everything is impermanent, so we should not hide or lie . Those things are useless.

-"I think you have heard these things for the first time."
I heard it more times than you can imagine and every time I ask a person that question and nobody ever could give prove that things happens this way and not another way (according to other theories)

- Those things have to understand by ourselves, practically when we see those things then no need to ask from anyone. I think you will agree with the things that I have said already. Don't you see the difference of people. When we were born we didn't think and born , we should born to these parents, we should born in this country, we should have our appearance like this, we should have these siblings. No, without our knowledge we have born. After that then only we know everything. Everybody knows parents only give our body and not the mind, so it means we had that mind earlier also.
I will give you an example, when we were schooling we learnt the water has formed by hydrogen and oxygen, whether the people know it or not definitely there is hydrogen and oxygen in there. Scientist have found it, even so there were people who knew how this world has origin, how it's remaining and decaying. To understand those things there should be the wisdom. Knowledge can gain by using the texts, but to gain the wisdom you have to do the meditation. Knowledge and wisdom is two different things.

The people those who are intelligent and have the knowledge they are the people who have studied in universities and do good professional jobs. But they don't know when they will get sick or when they will die.

Another example, supposed a man is riding on a horse back and come to the destination and some one ask how did you come and when he doesn't know how he came what is use of his knowledge whether he is a doctor or a judge or an engineer. Like that people are dying without a knowledge of himself or herself.

- If a person do not do bad things, unlucky in life, has many troubles, it does not mean that he had many sins in previous life
If somebody cheats and steals, but has everything and no trouble it does not mean that he was great in previous lives
But karma states exactly that

-Lord buddha said basically said only three things, nothing is permanent, because of that it is sad, and if something is not permanent and sad it is not fair to say for a wise man to say this is me, my, I, myself, that is egolessness. Getting older, getting sick and finally the death . Nobody like those things. But whether we like it or not those things are happening. Those things are common to every being in this universe. Whether it's a king or a bagger. You see when we were as youth we enjoyed our life as much as possible. But without our knowledge now we are elders. So we can't behave as youths anymore. That's the nature. Now our parents have passed away, when we were Young we didn't think about it. Days are flying,


- yes, that is true-days are flying

-My dear madam, when you are alone and free think about what I said so simply. Then you will agree with me what I have said.

 - I do not believe to Karma thing
It does not make sense to me
People use it against each other
" O, you don't have luck in life-its your fault, you did too much bad things in your previous lives"...but they do not know that, they believe what was said to them and they judge based on that

 -Take it or leave it is up to you, I am not too smart to explain it. But what do you think about the difference of the people, what is the cause of it.

-I have a theory. I will write it down later

-O. K

-It's not too easy to put it in words, but according to "karma law" it comes as originally everybody was the same , then they started to live lives , behave differently, get consequences. but At Start everybody were the same

 -Yes, not easy. Those things are very complicated and not to argue. According to the individual intelligence things are taking. So better to exchange the daily life experience, I think so.

 -How are you, hope you are fine.


- I'm fine. here is a theory for you different than Karma
All people are small parts of something whole and big
Every part (or human) has own goals (as wheels and doors in the car)
Different lives help a person to learn different lessons to figure out and reach his goal. Going through the life a human being should have that attitude to situations happened to him , people on his way, relationship with them , etc, having deeper understanding, change, and grow. That is why for different people  everything is different


- You are talking about the general lives of people. But philosophy is not that. Buddhist philosophy teach you how these everything origin, existing and the decaying. People are looking to live the life. For an example, a man is searching certain things in the dark by using a touch. Some people are searching how the touch is working, and it's mechanism , even so everyone is using these organs and feel different things. But very few people are trying to learn how it's happening.

-Karma is also general kind of law. Everybody talk, but NO any proof that everything works that way and not another way

-In this life you know people are getting older and getting sick and finally the death. But you never thought even though we don't like it and how it's happening. That is called meditation.
Those subjects are unable to prove by arguing, only by mind you have to realize. Everybody knows there is a reincarnation. But can't show it in a laboratory. But by some signs people know there is a birth after this life.
There are cassettes and discs, you can't put a disc to a cassette player and listen to music, for that you have to use a disc player. Even so to realize about those things you must have the wisdom. Not the knowledge. Those things are two different things.

-There are many  proves Some people remember previous lives
But WHERE is Karma  accounts of deeds proof? Where?

-You can see it by people themselves. What makes the people's different. As I told you in my very eelier message, there are different children born to the same parents. Genetics are same but people are different. That's the karma.
One is a lawyer and the other is a thief , one is an athlete and the other is a disabled. Those are karma.

-Did you read my theory why people are different? its not me who created it, but it makes more sense to me. Have a nice evening

- Some people say God has created this world within 7 days. Is it a possible thing. It's not a wise man to say so. And it's not a practical thing . Given stripes to seibras, as finger prints are not same the stripes also different from one to another. Once I asked from a main priest , you say the God has created this world, then I asked who created the God. No answer. In this world nothing is happening randomly, everything has a reason. So those things are useless things. Be wise...

- " everything has a reason."....but people do not know it...they make different guesses, create  theories and believe in them

- That's why Lord buddha said don't believe as it comes from the generation, or by hearsays, or in the texts, or your teacher said. When you know for yourself certain things are good and wholesome then accept them and follow them, when you know for yourself certain things are bad and unwholesome then leave it. Those are the real wise thoughts.

-I do exactly like that . For me Karma theory is not good I explained why

-According to Buddhism there are four types of karma. Some are occurred in this life, some are occurred in the next birth, some are occurred in any birth, some will not occurred. According to Buddhism if someone not accept karma is superstition. Actually it's very hard to explain in English because all words and explanation in pali language. So what do you think, people are killing animals, stealing, telling lies, misbehaving sexual habits, taking intoxicates, don't you think there will be no reaction for those things, in Buddhism those things are called 5 precepts. Some people kill there parents, don't you think there will be no reaction given by the nature. That is called karma. If someone does those things even in this life gets a punishment by the law. But the natural law is more hard and fearful than getting a punishment in prison.

If you think everything is happening according to the God's wish then you should blame to him than praying to him. How many disasters happening in this miserable world. How many people are praying to him. But he doesn't care. If he does care about the world which he created those miserable things will not happen. He created some people in deaf, blind, disabled limbs, dumb, how many people dead because of covid, but he didn't care, at least didn't look at even, so don't you think those kind of believes good for foolish.

It's so difficult and hard to understand even for the born Buddhists. So a person like you is extremely hard to understand about those things, only a fedup of explaining those subjects, that's why I said if you like we will talk about day to day life. Haha.

 - Someone has problems in life-no health, dear people are dying. Trouble after trouble. I'm telling him "All this happening, because you deserve it. Its your pay off for previous lives behavior. Be good. Be grateful for your suffering"
And what is the point of it?

-Now you understand, yes 90% people are paying for what they have done in the previous life. Good karma for good things, bad karma for bad things, even the Albert Einstein said Every action has an equal reaction. Now I am preparing meals for me and my pet. Lunch time. I don't know how many years more have to do the same thing.


Now you understand, yes 90% people are paying for what they have done in the previous life....I understand that concept, but I do not accept it
"According to Buddhism if someone not accept karma is superstition."
OK, I'm NOT a Buddhist!

"That's why Lord buddha said don't believe as it comes from the generation, or by hearsays, or in the texts, or your teacher said. When you know for yourself certain things are good and wholesome then accept them and follow them, when you know for yourself certain things are bad and unwholesome then leave it. Those are the real wise thoughts."
I agree with that part! That means I'm a Buddhist!

-Superstition means not believing about karma, no reincarnation, no results of sins and merits, no results of armsgiving (charity), that is the superstition. According to Buddhism means only the Lord buddha has explained before any religious leaders. You know, I have seen many people here and some other sites they are doing meditation. According to there clarification they don't know even the meaning of that. They think doing yoga is the meditation.


According to Wikipedia
A superstition is any belief or practice considered by non-practitioners to be irrational or supernatural, attributed to fate or magic, perceived supernatural influence, or fear of that which is unknown. It is commonly applied to beliefs and practices surrounding luck, amulets, astrology, fortune telling, spirits, and certain paranormal entities, particularly the belief that future events can be foretold by specific (apparently) unrelated prior event

-I think you are clever in English, so when you are free just try to have a look on the internet about karma . I don't learn from the internet because I have read enough books about those things. Even in Sri Lanka and some other Asian Buddhist countries very few Buddhist monks preaching the exact thing.

-I LEARNED a lot of info about Karma. For ME it is not acceptable.  I like things which are obvious, can be proven and can be seen by me. I believe to those things. Not because someone else decided so and said it is True

"That's why Lord buddha said don't believe as it comes from the generation, or by hearsays, or in the texts, or your teacher said. When you know for yourself certain things are good and wholesome then accept them and follow them, when you know for yourself certain things are bad and unwholesome then leave it. Those are the real wise thoughts."
I agree With that part!

-You are very correct, I forgot to tell you practicing certain uncommon things also superstition. In India when Lord buddha was alive there were many practicing doing by some people. I don't know the English names of those things, but some people acting like dogs, some were acting like cows. They believed giving a hard activities to the body and they will be born in heaven. After meeting our teacher they excluded everything and became Buddhist monks.
That's why once Lord buddha said my doctrine is for the people those who know and not to the people those who don't know. And this doctrine can't understand by arguing, only from your knowledge have to realize.

-Where those knowledge come from ?

-Everybody knows they will die one day, but who is going to think about it while living. Only a Buddhist use to think about it. That is called insight meditation. My dear madam now I think enough of talking about philosophy, haha. Isn't it. Because I am not very much clever at teaching someone who is a fresh comer, and the other thing is it is so difficult to explain in English. Haha, even by their own language people don't understand those things. So how can I explain the philosophy in English. Haha. It is like explaining about the white color to a blind man. Once a man said to a blind man it is white color. He can't see no. So he asked what is white color. Then this man said it is like Swan. Then the blind man asked what is Swan like. Then the man did a posture by hand and the blind man touch it and from that day he thought white color is like..... Haha.

-"Everybody knows they will die one day, but who is going to think about it while living. Only a Buddhist use to think about it"...Many people think about that  and me too....

"Because I am not very much clever at teaching someone who is a fresh comer, and the other thing is it is so difficult to explain in English"...I'm not fresh comer to that. I just have beliefs different from yours. You have problems to accept is. Which is contrary to what your teacher Buddha taught

"That's why Lord buddha said don't believe as it comes from the generation, or by hearsays, or in the texts, or your teacher said. When you know for yourself certain things are good and wholesome then accept them and follow them, when you know for yourself certain things are bad and unwholesome then leave it."
 Those are the real wise thought. Your English is very nice and not a problem

-You asked where these knowledge come from. Only by doing meditation those knowledge have to gain. There are scientist who have found many theories by there knowledge. But to realize about the invisible things have to meditate. There are ghosts and demons, some people have seen them. But we have not. And it's not fair to exclude those things because we have not seen. Whether we seen or not there are ghosts. Scientist have found there is hydrogen and oxegion in the water. But for ordinary people they don't know. Whether they know or don't know hydrogen and oxegion in the water. Like wise there are certain things in this universe which we can't see and there were people who have seen.

According to your messages I can guess you are an intelligent person and if you have the willing to know more about the universe you have the ability to understand. Dear madam I think it's better to speak about Albania, how the Russian ruled earlier. Haha.

-" Like wise there are certain things in this universe which we can't see and there were people who have seen"....That is an issue of FAITH and people have CHOICE to accept or not accept different Faiths

-Faith is different from people to people. But the universal truth and natural law is common to every being. From the African tribe to England palace.

-"the universal truth and natural law" And what is this?

-Those things are the things which rules the universe. Supposed someone kills a animal. At that time some people and invisible spirits may seen that. But when karma comes to him nobody is there to give a punishment. Naturally it will come to him. That's common to every being. Even the God is under that natural law. I think you have seen in the internet CCTV cameras show some ghosts and demons, before they became to that position they were as human beings. No God has done it. Because some of their bad karma they became as ghosts. Even they don't know what happened to them. That is the natural law. You see, did you think and born in Albania to your parents. No . After you born then only you know these are my parents, these are my siblings. With out our knowledge many things are happening. We don't know from where did we come. We don't know when we will die, we don't know where we will Born again. So how can we say that there is a person called " I" ,"my", "mine ". actually this is a natural activation . People don't know that. That's why during this short life people are struggling and killing each other. Though those words are simple as I said above it's not simple as we think. That much those things are complicated. Have you seen or heard on the internet some billionaires use to get suicide, though they have everything. People think if we have money every thing is o. K., But it's not.
Oh my God too long message.

-"That's common to every being. Even the God is under that natural law."
Who said that?
"That's why during this short life people are struggling and killing each other" WHY people kill each other?

-Who said God has created this world. The God? Then who created that God, if it's so , that spirit is more mighty and powerful than God. That's why I said all those things have created by human beings in their minds. Those are nonsense. People are killing each other because of the greediness.
I have seen just now about Tirana, beautiful city. But the village life is more beautiful. Himare I saw.

Women kill their husbands, husbands kill there wives to get the insurance money. Because of the greediness. Mighty countries try to undertake some countries, that is about the greediness of power. That's what Hitler did.
Why you are interested in Autism. Do you have that. Are you taking medicine for that.

-I  work with autistic kids. Autism does not need medication. Why you think so?

-I see, I got it wrong, I think you have that. It's o. K. I just had a look on Google. It's not a big problem. I think when they are familiar with people and certain things they will open up their mind to communicate.
People those who like the calmness loudness is a problem. Most difficult thing in this world is to keep quiet as you like. But have to tolerate it.
Once I saw an article , "oh. God , your sea is  too big and my boat is too small ", that is totally correct. Not an easy thing to spend the life here.

-They have different "operating system of thinking and perceiving"

-Sorry I have told you something about it, actually I have not studied about those things. I thought you got angry with me. I have taught to children in government school, but my subject was different. Even so I have learned western psychology when I was in the training college.
According to your profile you are much educated than me. I am just a trained teacher. I don't have any degree.

12:29 CET
When my parents alive I was very playful guy. I didn't like to get any responsibilities when I was a youth. That's why I didn't get marry even. Otherwise I had many opportunities.
12:32 CET
But the time is flying, we are like a log floating on a stream. One day it will end up in the sea. Haha. That's the life.
12:34 CET
Even my parents didn't force me to do any Job. My mother was a deputy principal in a leading girls high school and my father was a special commissioner. Both have passed away now.

-I'm not angry. Why should I? What kind of teacher you are? What I wrote about autism its not popular idea. Popular one is an illness and medication-yes
How it is in your country?

- Actually I have no idea about autism. Because I have not met any child or a adult. Even if I would met such a person I didn't know whether they have autism. Haha. I was trained as a English teacher. I did it at the level best of me. My teachers asked me not to leave the job. When I was in the college I was a good student, but at the same time I was a very playful guy. The youth doesn't come twice. So enjoying in the youth is not a problem.
How about you madam, do you have children, if it's so I think they are grown up and already got married. I think here in Sri Lanka we don't have any hospital or any institution for autism kids.

-yes, get married with own children
here is about autism in your country
https://www.daddyslanka.com/

-Oh. I will have a look. My surname is Lankadikara. So everyone called me Lanka. daddys Lanka I will take a look later. Yes there is a center for autism. Now only I knew that.

-Wow! its for your future name , when you have kids.
I'm curious about that
At DaddysLanka Autism Centre in Sri Lanka we have designed a quick assessment method which gives faster and accurate insight into the problem.
Very interesting, but no details. Diagnosis is very controversial issue
I'm not a professional, I have only small degree for day care education, but I have big practice with those kids

-I will not have any kids in this life. Now I am 60,
I have to prepare some meals for my pet. Experience is more valuable than what is in the texts. I hope you are doing well in your job.

-I met a penpal from a site, she is from Johannesburg, she is a white woman, she was older than me. After she got to know me we were the best friends, she liked me very much.  Nearly 5 years we were together. She was to come on December. Unfortunately last April she died from a breast cancer. I cried very much.

-Sorry to hear that. Very sad story indeed

-I think you don't feel alone because you have a family. But one day we will have to leave our beloved ones. That's why Lord buddha said the life is miserable. Your parents also have passed away I think so.

-life is not miserable if to think differently
do your best during the period given

- I know much better than you about it. That's why I was always all the time spent happily and freely. But when we think the way they treated us then feel very sad. As a Buddhist when I was at the age of 20,21 I learned about the world, supposed you have a dog and if he always with you and loves very much and if he dies how do you feel. Some people don't worry about those things. You should have a kind and soft heart to feel like that. Only a selfish person doesn't worry about what happened to the other.

-Yes, people die and animals die (my bird died), lot of sad things in life, but at the same time a lot of great things as well, although
According to Buddhism life is suffering!!!

-Do you have pets with you. I have a lovely German Shepherd. I bought him he was only one month. Now 3 years. You see, you also suffered when your bird dead. Once I bought two pigeons from a petshop to release the from the cage. After I brought them home I opened the box to release. The male has flown quickly but the female stayed with me in the home. I never put she in a cage. 3 months she was with me and one day she flown away. Then I bought a very little foreign parrot not put in a cage. After 2 weeks it has gone when I was out. That day I felt very sad and I thought I must get someone who can't fly. Haha. That's why I bought this German Shepherd.

Buddhism is not to suffer in the life, but to realize about the life. Lord buddha had explained how to spend the secular life happily as well as the spiritual life. What do you think about your life. Now your Yong age has gone, and one day if you will get sick and unable to get the things done yourself and can't eat or Walk properly then you will understand how the life is like. One day we were proud about our  appearance and the out side world also said you are a handsome man, but one day we will have to suffer from the same body which we consumed. Still you are healthy and have no illness so you don't feel sad, but one day when you will get more older and have to stay in the same place then you will realize what I have told you now.

-I am cooking now.

-Good appetite
-Haha, what appetite, just for hungry.
With whom are you living there.

-Good appetite means "enjoy your food"
When person cooking, usually its for eating. No?

- Yes yes, but appetite means take something to get desire to eat something.
Haha, you said material things are better than psychological things. I also think so. But even the material things also decide whether it's beautiful or not by the mind.

-No conversation, only two three words, only I have to say or ask something, you give only a short answer, I think you don't like very much to talk with me.

- How are you, I am very curious about your silence. Are you o. K.

-Hi! I'm OK, but busy now with some things. I'll write later
-O. K. Take care.

-Hello! how are you doing! answering your question
I wrote a lot about Karma-no good
I sent some short messages-no good
Autism no interest
I do not want to discuss personal stuff
I suggested to discuss countries-no good
I don't really know what to say

-Just we will get to know each other better as good friends. Then automatically ideas will come to exchange. Still we feel strange to each other. But I think you just guessed I am a good person and I also guess you are too. That's why we have exchanged even few messages. I'm sorry I couldn't answer to your first question, I am doing well. Nothing important, just my pet besides me all the time. Are you still working with the children in preschool.
You know, there is nothing happened randomly. Everything has a reason. There are more than 600 billion people in the world. But during our life time we meet only few people to associate. They may be loving ones or maybe enemies. That also has a reason. That's the natural phenomena. So meeting a person is not a simple thing. Isn't it.

-What "good person" means for you?

-If someone doesn't tell lies, if someone doesn't cheat anyone, if someone doesn't steal , if someone doesn't have any jealousy or anger, if someone willing to give charity when he has, if someone respect to the people those who are respectable, indeed he is a good person.

-But through internet how you could learn of that?

-A message is a thought. So by the ideas and the way it express you can guess what type of a person who is he/she. You know there are people here with in two three messages we don't feel to have a conversation.

- How are you

-Hello ! I'm fine. Here is a question. I watched video about Shri-Lanka and expats and "People are good, kind and helpful"
But when they started to tell their person stories
- If local people see that my business is like  theirs-they become mad
- If there is a chance to steal or not to pay or taking advantage -they will do it. Its about regular people behavior, not criminals

In Albania there is similar situation
People are good and kind, but people are lying a lot and if a person gets in trouble -NO help whatsoever from anybody. People will use the situation to get benefited from it So, are people good or bad?

-My dear madam, you sent a real message and you asked a wonderful question. Simply I have to say for your question , 5 fingers on the hand are not same. Even so different people different ideas different mentalities. So don't worry about the society. We can't correct them. Haven't you heard even the police officers steal, not only police officers but even some judges used to steal. So what we have to do is just looking at our selves and if we don't do the bad things that's enough. And it will help us to get a better birth in our next birth even.

I told you some are jelous, so they don't like to see others are doing well. In my religion it's a sin. We would like to see the others also same like us. But it will never happen. At that time we feel sad and some times angry. But what to do. In a jungle there are many many trees and plants and bushes. But only very few valuable trees are there. Even so in the society only very few people are genuine, most of them are bastards. What we have to do is avoid those people and not to associate them. But knowing a person is not a easy thing. From the out appearance of animals we can say this is a dog, this is a cat, this is a bird etc... But from the out appearance of people can never say.
When people got to know that we are very honest then they take the advantage of it and use to cheat us. I have many experience. But I don't get sad.
After thinking about the out side world only the remaining thing is sadness. Once Lord buddha said if you don't have to associate someone better to live alone.

-My dear friend, I would like to ask one question, because I don't hide my thoughts, that is my attitude from the birth. The question is why do you take more time to reply. Are you thinking about the message long time and deeply?

-no, different reasons. sometimes I'm busy talking to somebody
sometime I'm outside with the phone



- We had a lot of rain then a couple of sunny days and now no sun again and cold...winter starts

-Here now raining. After few days. Here we have no seasons.

-No season is it a little bit boring-nothing to expect ahead-all the same.
but you must have no cold at all. It's nice

-Some cities are there the whole year mostly cold. Some are mostly dry  . But our city neither hot no cold. Medium climate. Only kandy has the medium climate in Sri Lanka.

-Yes, I deal a lot with psychology. You do know what is Messia or Savior
Do you have one in Buddhism?

-Messiah (not messia)  means a Arabic religion. I don't understand what you mean by" do you have one in Buddhism ". I think you asked any leader in Buddhism. In Buddhism there is a teacher. And his students.

-Ok in the future no leader will come to save people and lead them to better place as in Christianity- Jesus- Messiah. People are waiting for savior. Nothing like that exists in Buddhism Right?

-In Buddhism none can save nobody, unless you save yourself. In Buddhism every individual has to purify their lives. Whether to hell or heaven it's up to you. Teachers teach the way. Going on that path is up to us.

-As I told very earlier if you plant a mango seed you will get a mango tree. Not a coconut tree. No God is done that. That is the natural phenomena. Even so you will get what you have done. That logic is very reasonable and very natural.

- Yes, its true, only human being in his body is dependable on so many different circumstances. For example-you got a child and teach him to be good and kind. then that child grow and meet different people and different information and chose to be cruel and bad....and then what? Its your seed

- Not because of the bad company only, he or she gain certain things that they have practiced their minds in their past birth. It is in the mind without the knowledge and when growing those things are also activating naturally.

- How are you, I think you are o. K. Once in a blue moon send me a message.
Why don't you message me. I didn't expect that you have forgotten me so earlier.

-Was busy the whole day. How are doing! What is up?

I am just getting on. Nothing much. Just spend the day with the pet. Send me a message when you are free.

-Hello!  How are you! What do you think about that?

Having good children is very convenient for adults.

Good children, like flowers in pots, arranged on the windowsills, delight the eye. But for life to be "good", alas, is very bad. Then you have to get rid of “goodness” for a long time and with effort. So it's better if they don't feel as they are convenient. But they will be brave, able to stand up for themselves, knowing their desires, needs and boundaries. Let them get used to evaluating themselves, and not looking into the eyes of teachers. Let, if necessary, be rude and hit back. Let them not be good. Let them be happy!

-Haha, you asked a wonderful question from a unmarried man. Anyway I will tell something about it. Having children is not a convenient thing, but a headache. When they were babies everybody loves them. When they are getting older they have different choices and they want to live the way they want. When the parents don't like their way each other getting angry with them. Some times parents don't like their wives or husbands. Sometimes parents don't like what they consumed. To tell it in a simple way children are headache. Once a king asked from Lord buddha, " venerable sir, parents are happy with the children ",then the Lord buddha said " parents are sad with the children ". think about your parents. They gave birth to you. Now even you don't know where are they now. You are on your own way and they are in their way according to the karma.

-Asking other parents would be their own story or if story not good-than it would be lying. So it does not matter. What Lord Buddha said
For example animals-have kids teach them skills to survive and forget them-making new kids. How should be with humans? The same or different?

- It's different. Animals have only the basic needs, when they are little or older. So they treat each other from the beginning in the same way. But human are different. The things parents do like children may not like. And the things parents like children may not like. That's why the arguments occurred. Even with your children or husbands or wife every one has a different mentalities. When they are not tally with each other problems will occur.

- So what Buddhism has to say about parenting?

-He is the only spiritual leader who admire the parents than any others. And he said the responsibilities of the parents as well as children how to treat each other. At the moment I can't remember all. But nowadays there are parents who kill their own children and there are children who kill their parents. You can see on internet. The world is upside down now. My parents treated me at the level best of them. Specially Asian countries treat their parents in a good manner. But here also very very little amount of people treat in the bad way. Every herd have black sheeps. That is the world. If you see some documentaries about USA you will not believe.

- I know what is going nowadays, that is why I'm curious how it could be different, consider that kids are not born as "clean slate", without any baggage in them, so parents can shape them the way they want to.
So, how it could work together and what is the way according to Buddha?

- Every parents want their children to be Kings, but it's not happening as they wish. According the karma nature will decide it whether to be a king or a bagger. That's why every one has a horoscope. Zodiac sign. Now even western and Europeans believe that. That's why the only Lord Buddha's statue is in front of the NASA academy.

- So, parents should have no mental/moral  wishes for their children? Just provide food, clothes and shelter?....the rest horoscope does...

- Haha, even though parents have it children go their way. If there is any one who fallows the parents in the exact way let me know. If there is someone he will be the only person in this world.
Supposed your son does smoke and if you can stop it it's a miracle. This is just only a example. Do your son married the woman that you want.? Haha. It will never happen.

So, what parents SHOULD do according to Buddha theory?

-Oh my dear friend how can someone control someone's life. Even the Lord buddha teach the way only. Take it or leave it is up to the person who listen it. Only you can say this thing is good this thing is bad. Following the advice is up to the person.

-I never said anything about control...I just asked Buddha view on that issue

- I have told you several times, everyone is responsible for their own life. When I was a youth I was a very playful guy though I was a teacher. I spent every minute in some enjoyment. I used to smoke listen to reggae music, but I never did any harmful thing to the society. Just only I enjoyed myself. So my mother was a deputy principal in a leading school and she was afraid and told me we can give you every possible things to you but you only can make up your mind yourself. We can't do that. Even so everyone has certain things which they have practiced in their past births. Now I control myself and spend a calm life. That's called the karma or fate. Some children are there they behave in a bad manner and when they grow up they become very precious. On the other side some are good in youth and become bad later. That's the karma.

- OK. Parent bit their child when he was a baby and made him disable
Child's fault?

- Haha, you are asking marvelous questions. Haha bit and disabled. Ordinary people even the judge may accused that parent. We people are ordinary people. So exactly we can't say the deep consequence of the incident. But there should be a great karma of that baby to happened such a thing in that age. To get a feeling to the parent to do such a thing definitely it's a child's karma. He might have done a such a thing even to an animal.

- HA! That is why I hate that Karma talk. Parent got drunk, hurt the child
And its NOT parent's fault. Child needed it to fix his Karma -should say "thanks" to the parent
Bravo!!!!

-Nothing is happening randomly. Every thing has a reason. Born in to such parents is the most sad karma . Lord buddha said everything is not happening according to karma. There are 4 natural phenomenas. I can't translate in to English. Just to give you a clue, karma, dhamma (things arising in the mind), plants are having the results according to the seeds, and the 4 seasons (winter, Autumn.....).I don't know the English words for those things. You may not understand.

-That is the result theory of karma. DO you like it? "That is why I hate that Karma talk. Parent got drunk, hurt the child...And its NOT parent's fault
Child needed it to fix his Karma -should say "thanks" to the parent
Bravo!!!!"

- You compare yourself with the out side world. How much you educated, how wealthy you are, how healthy, how is your parents, children, husband, enemies, beloved ones, the things that you face day today life..... All are mostly karma. So never say that you don't believe on karma. As a Christian and the religion you fallow from your childhood those things are difficult to explain to you and it is very reasonable that you don't believe on those things. Because may be for the first time you hear these things.

-Just read what I wrote and respond
Its NOT about believing
-WHERE I compare myself with outside world? WHERE? Show me MY words about comparing

-Even in karma there are 4 ways to occur. Some are in this life itself, some are in next birth, some are in any time in any birth, some will exhausted. (Not occur). actually it's difficult to translate to English for I am not a native speaker. Even a native speaker have to refer certain books and learn those words. English people have translate from Pali. Only Buddhist monks those who know English and Pali know the real words.

-Do you understand now what I say. Do you understand WHAT I ASKED you?
-It simple questions. Why you do not answer them?

-Haha haha, though it's simple to you for me it's hard. -Better we talk about the weather or moon and sun . Haha.

-"You compare yourself with the outside world."- you wrote
I asked
WHERE I compare myself with outside world? WHERE? Show me MY words about comparing? What is hard there? I would like to understand

-Comparing means there are billionaires and we don't have like that, there are more educated people than us . That is their karma. This is our karma.

-So "YOU" did not refer to me? -then to whom? -That is the result theory of karma
Parent got drunk, hurt the child
And... its NOT parent's fault
Child needed that experience  to fix his Karma -should say "thanks" to the parent. I CANNOT accept that stupid things. That promotes crime without punishments'

-My dear friend, we better talk about Russia and Ukraine war. Haha. Actually it's difficult me to answer to your questions. Once you said we will talk about the countries. That's good I think.

-What kind of difficulty you experience about parent hurting child example?
Its easy to talk about theories. To connect theories with real life-that is difficult. All religions also have that problem

-Personally I don't have any experience about child hurting. But I have seen enough of things through the Medias. -In this general day today life it's difficult to connect, that's right. That's why there is a law. But in Sri Lanka some accused released from the courts according to the ability of the lawyer. But judge use to say the natural law will punish you. I have seen it on Media.

-We discussed Karma Its example Theory Karma in real life

-How can I discuss karma with some one who doesn't believe it.

-When I spent time with friends and feel alone I used to call or message to my earlier friend. She never said I am driving or I am busy, I am in the super market, never. Every time she used to respond to me. Now she is passed away. So can you imagine how valuable a trustworthy friend. Even now I feel sad and cry in my heart. There is no alternation. For 5 years can't stay with the same feeling with your husband or children. But we were so close. Now she has passed away.

-You told me about your friend. I feel sorry that it happened. You discussed Karma  before. Why can't you do now? Because it's not easy to connect it to real life????

-Yes, it's default to connect to the real life, according to incidents happening in  the out side world we have to come to a conclusion. In a laboratory can't prove it. With the self knowledge and intelligence only have to realize that. That's why Lord buddha said my doctrine is to the people those who know and not to the people those who don't know. And once he said you should realize according to the knowledge of yourself. I have told you many examples and still you have a suspicion what can I do.

-Its NOT about you-its about religions or teachings, when connection to real life Situations. I brought MY example to discuss c position of Karma
Do you remember?

- I have told you about karma by using examples, by theories, according to my knowledge. Other than that I'm not very much clever to explain it dear friend.

-I don't need explanations about Karma
I wanted to look for clear and simple example I brought and asked how THAT example is explained from Karma position (not from justice System position)
If a child should be thankful to father for making him disable, than how a person  can accept such ridiculous thing???

-I brought up the topic which is known and close to you, right? I did not suggest to discuss autism

-To tell you very frankly that child has done a tremendous sin in his past birth. The people who are killing animals after death they will born in hell. When they release and if they born again in a human parent they will be disabled, die in their very early age, getting different kinds of sickness, those are the few results of their karma. Whether you believe it or not that's the truth. I told you very briefly. Those things are believing even Buddhists are very few even though they are born Buddhists. That's why the Buddhism is for very rare people in this world.
There are western and European monks who became as Buddhists. None of them are uneducated or junkies. All are highly educated and Rich people.

-Parent did good thing to the child then. OK
Those who are stealing and lying and NOTHING bad happened to them in this life means in previous lives they behaved good....nice
Now so many Russian young people and Ukrainian military and civilians are suffering or dead....because in previous lives they sinned a lot

YOU decided that  ''that child has done a tremendous sin in his past birth. The people who are killing animals after death they will born in hell."

That is exactly what I've heard from people focused on Karma....they easily imputed on me whatever sins they wanted.. if I shared some trouble happened to me..   IT cannot be Truth

-There are people who are killing animals more than 1000 s as a profession. In this life they live a good life with that money. Have everything. But only for a short period. They have to pay for what they have done. To get a feeling to killing animals is their karma. Because of that they get the thought or feeling to do so. Every one doesn't get that feeling. In my case if someone says to me if you don't kill this animal I will kill you. Even that if I die I never do that.
Lord buddha said there are 4 types of people in this world. From the dark to the light, from the dark to the dark,  from the light to the dark, from the light to the light.
It means some people are born in miserable places but they are doing good things and become to a precious life. Some are there they born in a bad way and doing bad things and go to miserable places. Some are there they born in a precious way and doing bad things and go to bad places. Some are there born in a precious way and doing good things and go to precious places. Those things are common to this life as well as to the next life. I think you will understand what I wanted to say.

-It is YOU decided that the boy whose drunken father made him an invalid hurt animals in previous life. YOU decided it. YOU,  an ordinary human being ....decided it for another human being...

-I don't decide it. No ordinary one can decide. Scientists are founding certain things by doing experiments which they can see and touch. Only the intelligence need to do that. Albert Einstein have found even atoms , but finally he came to India and became a Buddhist. From the birth he was a jew , to find out the invisible things have to do some meditation. The knowledge that gain from the meditation call Wisdom. That's what Lord buddha did. Those theories didn't create by Lord Buddha. Only the thing he did was through his wisdom the things that occurring in the world he said. He saw heaven and hell and how it's activating. There were many Buddhist monks also had that power those who lived during the Lord Buddha's period. Now no one is existing like that. There are two types of people. The ordinary and spiritual people.
-Everybody can believe in whatever they like to. You want to believe that its a child's fault-OK. The bad thing here is when people think- only their beliefs are Right and other people beliefs are wrong

-I have told you several times, that should be parents falls also. Every parents don't bite and make their children disabled. A rare incident.  So most probably the karma.
I don't have personal beliefs. Even Lord buddha said don't believe as in the texts, or rumours, or it's suit for the generation, or as your teacher said. When you know for yourself only these things are good and wholesome then accept it and fallow them. How reasonable and how wise he is. He said even his doctrine believe at once. Rationally think about it and come to a conclusion. Even by those words you can imagine how much he respected to the personal life. I believe him because he said only three things. (1) everything is not permanent, (2) because of impermanency it's sad, (3) and if something is not permanent and sad it's not fare to take a wise man as " my, mine, me ". that is called the egolessness. When we can't remain our body as we want, even we can't keep the mind as we want. It's changing every second. We don't like if we get angry, we don't like jealousy, we don't like hatred, we don't like sadness,. But those things are arising. It means we can't keep our minds every time as we want.
I have told you certain things more than enough. Take it or leave it is up to you. I think it's enough of talking about karma.
My dear friend, this topic is an unending topic. For both of us can't come to a compromise.

-People, who believe in certain religion or certain theories or philosophies unfortunately are deaf to everything else. You can have your view, I can have mine. Nothing is wrong with it
I think your Lord Buddha supported that idea

. “Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.”

I told you a few times that I follow the same concept, "When you know for yourself only these things are good and wholesome then accept it and fallow them."

I do that on my own and 100 wise men cannot change my mind

Don't you see how you ignore my arguments, and put yours instead

I gave the example of child/parent to illustrate My Point . I could make hundred other examples " she was raped....her husband beat her....his house was burned..etc.,etc.,All that happened  because of Karma....they did wrong things in previous lives...

That is a horrible theory to follow "blaming the victim", which became popular  and destructible now (including psychology)

"I have told you several times, that should be parents falls ALSO"
It's  PARENT  FAULT ONLY and NOTHING else is there

Buddha words supports that

“How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.”

Because of  ATTITUDE people adopted  real crime or evil deeds are often being put on victims, while those who made it get excuses or even being looked upon as making a favor to a sinner....Ridiculous thing!
I know many good things from Buddhism, but that one is completely  Wrong and Harmful and  probably not from Buddha. I did not find it, but  I found other things
“Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.”

(He repeated the same stuff over and over again)

-Do not believe anything simply..., How you found that. Excellent.
Again I say the examples you written here 90% karma. Why it doesn't happen to every one. If you have a husband who beats you that is your karma. If you beat him that is his karma. But don't forget the one who punish or does anything bad he or she will have to pay for that.

Anyway you read something. That's better than nothing. If you are on your way and believe only what you understand is not good. Think wisely and come to a conclusion. The basic 3 things which Lord buddha said no one can say it's not true. Even body knows everyone getting older, getting sick, and finally the death. But no one think about it when you are o. K. Thinking about those things called insight meditation. Not only one or twice. Continually. Then the wisdom will arise and automatically the realistic will come to your mind. That's the natural phenomena.

If you have not seen any ghosts or demons and if you say I can't believe that ghosts and deamons are existing. That's not fair for a intelligent person. Whether you have seen or not definitely there are. So don't be in your own decision and believness every time. We are learning everyday till we die. That much the universe is so vast and tremendous. " Oh God your sea is very big and my boat is very small ".
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-You say " If you have a husband who beats you that is your karma. If you beat him that is his karma."
Buddha said "“How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.”

You say "If you are on your way and believe only what you understand is not good".
 Buddha said "When you know for yourself only these things are good and wholesome then accept it and fallow them"
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Now I understand why communism forbade those things and why there is so much crime in our days...not from those who were holding for the Power, but among ordinary people