The Tale of Anna and Ludwig by A. N. Misharin

The layout is empty.  Behind the layout, we stand behind each other.  To the hall.  Or do we stand for layout, how the figures will stand up after.  To the hall.  We are coming.  We sit on different sides of layout.  Through it.

Me: It's not funny at all.

M: and not even a cautionary story.

Me: And is there a story at all?

M: Just a few dialogues.

Me: Yes, two live voices,

M: now long gone,

Me: Disappeared...

M: from the earthly ether — music. (songs).

Me: Is that enough for a 'story'? (light)

Me: Oh, what stories there are

M: with dressing up,

Me: dueling

M: abandoned babies,

Me: the living dead

M: party congresses

Me: And royal favours!

M: Shakespeare alone is worth something!

Me: Pure envy!

Me: What do we have?

M: ...In a simplistic tepid lobby

Me: our 'profitable' house

M: Stands tall

Me: shaved

M: in pince-nez,

Me: Ludwig Karl LEVE.

M: From relatives I know that he was

Me: an ex-banker.  German.  He leaned towards me

M: of ten years old

Me: and holds out warm,

M: with long red fingers,

Me: hand and smile...

M: Not like others, but probably in a special manner —

Me: 'in the bank-ish' manner... The Sun of July, breaking through the dirty stained-glass window of our front door, hits his polished bald head, and it shines — as if it grows behind his head... I like him,

M: but I, still small, feel shy and run away.

Me: I'm running away to forever remember his face,

M: and his name and his pince-nez...

Me: And the July halo of his 'bankdom' breaks away from the cage of muses.  How?  Why ... Former banker?  German?

M: The war has just ended...  And he is shining, unshakable,

Me: eternal...

M: At least in my memory.

Me: Because another thirty years will pass —

M: and my friends, having moved to a new apartment,

Me: furnish it with old, antique furniture.

M: And to my question about the origin, they will remind:

Me: 'Do you remember the old woman,

M: Anna Pavlovna? —

Me: Professor? Here she is, alone, and left everything to us — as a legacy of her.

I put the figurine next to the figurine — through the layout.

M: And I do remember a rather vociferous, quarrelsome,

Me: not unvulgar,

M: typical Soviet loud-voiced professor,

I: proud of the fact that she started by being a servant,

M: and became a doctor of chemical sciences.  And now for twenty years

Me: she is head of the department in Mendeleevka!

M: I didn't even like her

Me: She didn't even notice me.

M: Yes, and God be with her and with her inheritance,

Me: if the surname hadn't come up in the conversation

M: her long dead husband

M: Leve! — M. puts the figure of L.

Me: Ludwig Karlovich?

M: Yes

Me: Lord! Well, what doesn't happen in the world.  The two names linked in my memory.  Two faces surfaced and stood next to each other.  In my memory.  Why in mine?  After all, I was nobody to them — neither a son, nor a relative, nor a student ... Not even an heir, like my friends.  Year after year went by...

M: the map of the world changed, loved ones died,

Me: the closest ... Without which, it seems, you can't live a day, you can't just survive.

M: Break the pale veil of loneliness.

Me: But I lived, lived, sometimes wondering at myself,

M: getting old and,

Me: becoming more selfish and quiet... — Music

But in this silence sometimes, not often, but with marvelous perseverance

Me: (through layout) I heard their voices.

M: Yes, yes, them — Anna Pavlovna and her husband...

Me: They seemed to grow out of something inexplicably close to me — 

M: from the most secret memory.

Me: That I can't explain

M: I only know that each of us has it.  Hear and listen to other people's lives — that are approaching yours,

Me: they seem to forget

M: but they don't leave,

Me: but they haunt somewhere near you.

M: And they visit unexpectedly,

Me: unpredictably, lift us above our loneliness and selfishness.


(At first, it’s like the noise of an old record, where voices are barely distinguishable, where a needle creaks, like on an old gramophone. Then everything is clearer, more distinguishable... Wooden intonations disappear, as if on an old recording.)


ANNA — Mum gave me only this frying pan.  I left her very fast.  She grabbed it and said — take care, it is cast iron.  Wonderful.

LUDWIG — Indeed, wonderful.   I've never seen such perfection. And it's verily lightweight!

ANNA — Real cast iron! A scrambled egg on it turns out!

LUDWIG — What else?

ANNA — And I can't do anything else.  Have not tried.

LUDWIG — Well, we'll have to wait for the scrambled eggs — the house is empty.

ANNA — And how do you live?

LUDWIG — Alone (Anna hangs up the cloth).

ANNA — (Stopped. Firmly.) From now on — not alone.  I was assigned to you. The warrant has been issued.

LUDWIG — (Pause. Eye to eye to Anna.) This is a great joy.

ANNA — (In disbelief. Studying. Puzzled). Joy. I thought you were going to fight me.

LUDWIG — Fight? For what? (Pause).  I haven't left the house for a long time.  They thought I must have died.

ANNA — (not immediately) Yes... (dryly). I was told so. You dump the body there.  Wash ... And live.

LUDWIG — Wrong.

ANNA — Well, anyhow! You won't last long.

LUDWIG — Oh, yes, senility ... I'm already thirty-four...

ANNA — (Looks around. Aloud to herself.) Well, I'll break this locker — I'll scout out a potbelly stove.  It will be warmer.  I'll wait. (Her eyes, her house, she laughs).  I am patient!

She is cleaning, moving something, then wiping, etc.

LUDWIG — And where are you from. . ?

ANNA — (busily). From Bela Gorod.  Far-a-way! (Laughs). Oh, and longing for you!  Do not pass — do not sweep.  Why is there so much?

LUDWIG — While I was ill with typhus, all the rooms were occupied.  Condensed — that's what they say now.

ANNA — (laughs) And now we got to you.  Sure, you can live, you aren't any trouble for me.  Unless, of course, you'll manage to get back on your feet.

Finds the order.  The music breaks — Chopin.  Enters smoothly.

LUDWIG — And what's your name, dear?

ANNA — Nyusha.  You can Nyura ... But actually I'm Anna.

Music: 'Anna'

LUDWIG — Why go to Moscow? The war is still...

ANNA — Aye — to give birth! My father and brothers would have killed me if they knew.  My mother sent me to Moscow with a faithful man.

LUDWIK — To give birth? You?

ANNA — (laughs) It's not visible yet.  This is my big body. (She sighed: she remembered what was at home).  And in a month it would be too late ...  I've been here since Intercession ... (Turns off Ludwig with truth and pain).  Do you think it was easy for me to get a warrant for you? (Tough about the commissioner).  No wonder I lived three month with the servants of the big commissioner. (Thank God!) It was his wife who helped me out of sight — (explanation) oh, how she trembled for her Tibor! (Cunningly) I thought I’ll take him out of her bed ... (his face disappears — music laughs. She sings, wraps herself up).  Why are you quiet?

LUDWIG — (delirious; in German...)

ANNA — What's with you? Would you like to die? Not here ... How can I stay alone ... I still have to give birth. And you're a person anyhow.  Hey honey!  Listen ... why are you gibbering?  On what?  Hey! . . Don't die! Here's your order. This ... They collect you — the former ones.  Yes!  Strict summons.  You have to go, otherwise you will be shot.  Do you hear?  Quiet  ... Lord, rest the soul of your servant... (Pause, crying).  Well, so be it, I will say — he died!  Exhausted... (contractions).  Chopin.

Angel — (Christ was tormented.) Crying...

(That distant conversation flies away, as if carried away into space... So in the future there will be daily and nocturnal dialogues, explicit and hidden confessions, explanations... Not always in order chronologically — well, it's nothing... Let's figure it out!)

LUDWIG — Why are you crying?  I'm not dead?

ANNA — Well, you didn't die. (Sobbing) And I already distributed the room for myself.  I thought I would throw your sofa away...

LUDWIG — Such a sofa!

ANNA — Stupid, of course.  It had to be burned.  Warm weather is still two months away.

LUDWIG — Where can I go?

ANNA — That's what I'm saying — I was hoping you would die.

LUDWIG — (not immediately).  Why were you taking care of me then?  There's even milk ...  Did you get fresh eggs from somewhere?

ANNA — Eggs were sent to me from the village.

LUDWIG — I could sell it.

ANNA — (not immediately) Of course... (her eyes)

LUDWIG — Why are you silent? . .

ANNA — It's a pity... (sighed).  I would have such a cheerful room.  I would invite my friends over (gaily).  I got a job.  In a gumshoe factory.

LUDWIG — You smell like blue paint!

ANNA — I also thought — I'll be alone, so you can wash right in the room.

LUDWIG — (laughs). Are you ashamed of me?

ANNA — (boldly). Why are you, grandpa, ashamed?  In our village, the women of the old people never took into account.

LUDWIG — I understand — you are in your position... It's difficult.  How are you at the chemical plant?  Future mother.

ANNA — Well, and how am I supposed to live?  I've been selling all your books and pictures here.  What is worse, heavier — to the fire!  And what is prettier — for the market... And then they almost caught me.  Soviet power is strict...(Unexpectedly). I took on a big sin. (Pray).  When they came for you, she said — he died, a sinner.  So now you've been crossed off all lists.  And on cards too.  So it looks like you don't exist.

LUDWIG — And if not... You can kick me out, can't you?

ANNA (sighs). Oh, I'm looking at you ... and, at myself.  Beaten and robbed! You're already green with typhus.  And me — with a belly! (Suddenly).  You need to be washed!

LUDWIG — (horrified) Me? Washed?!

ANNA (calmly). And then you will wash me. (Seriously).  Do you need to live somehow? Eh?

AUTHOR: From their conversations it is difficult to understand that it was the most difficult post-revolutionary years.  They were small people and did not think about the happiness of mankind. They defended themselves from it ... And it took all their vitality.

History and specific people have different time references, great History remembers Revolutions, wars, coups, congresses, right and left deviations.  And a person remembers typhus, sucking hunger — month by month — terrible disappearances of loved ones ... He never remembers his own longing, does not associate it with a certain time... Maybe because she is always with him.  This sadness-longing... Both in their youth and in adulthood . . .

(Again, a quiet, almost whisper, conversation)

LUDWIG — (angry) Put the photos back.

ANNA — (laughs) I won't!  And she — a poseuse in a hat — who is she?

LUDWIG — This poseuse? My wife.

ANNA — Oh, it's scary... Why is she so old?

LUDWIG  — It's not old — it's just full of... And then a hat, a train... They must be getting old?

ANNA — Was she a lady?

LUDWIG (confused). Well, in a sense...

ANNA — And you are kind of ... the same. (Laughs, unfinished).

LUDWIG — (seriously) No, I was not a gentleman.  I am a banker.

ANNA (scared). Who-who?

LUDWIG — Chairman of the Moscow-Riga Mutual Credit Bank.  My office is now on Miasnitskaya.  I'll show you.

ANNA — It's where the People's Commissariat? (Puzzled).  Banker?!  Accountant, you mean?

LUDWIG — In a sense...(distracting).  And these are our twins, Karl and Gabi. Gabrielle ...

ANNA — Oh, and confusion! What names did they come up with... (Laughs).  Who is this old lady?

LUDWIG — My mother-in-law.  Baroness von Dernig.

ANNA — Noblewoman (sighs).  Oh, so the bullet is crying for you. All together — white, kontra... (Laughs) Are you afraid?

LUDWIG — Why?

ANNA — Why you don't leave the house for the fourth month.  You think I don't see  — the fear in you is great. (Quiet).  It will pass.

LUDWIG — (not immediately). It will pass... (pause).  It all will pass!

ANNA — (mournfully). I would've buried them ... my fat woman with her children, and with her mother-in-law.  And he was about to die.  And then look, I fell on your head! (Hush)  You, I suppose, were ready to kill after I get into your lair?  Ah?  Well, what is with your look!

LUDWIG (bewildered). What?

ANNA — I'm not a girl, suppose, I understand... (Either fun, or with despair).  Here I will give birth to your son... Karl the Second... And you will again walk like the king on the earth...

LUDWIG  — For me?  Son?

ANNA — For who else!  Not to yourself!

LUDWIG — (not immediately).  Why are you crying?

ANNA — If only you can say a kind word!  Always so twisted, twisted... Like a scale-beam!

(Quietly, from afar, barely audible music — as if from the other side of the world).

AUTHOR — The boy died in childbirth. They didn't even give him a name. A month later, Leve and Anna signed at the registry office.  It was April 1926.  They returned home together — there was no wedding, no witnesses.

(Anna puts on a gramophone record.  This is the then fashionable rumba).

LUDWIG — Shall we dance? (Anna is silent) Shall we go to the cinema? (Anna is silent)  Shout at me!  Hit ... Just don't be silent! (Anna is silent).

LUDWIG — We will live.  Somehow everything will work out...

ANNA — (after a pause) — You are the only one left with me.

LUDWIG — (quietly) Me? At your place?! 

ANNA — I won't lose you.  And don't think!  Stop burying me.

LUDWIG — (not immediately) And who else ... did you bury?

ANNA — Father. Brothers...

LUDWIG — When?!

ANNA — Ah, when... When everyone did! — Chopped them up — they were for Makhno.  And the mother was buried for the third month.

LUDWIG — How do you know?

ANNA — A faithful person told me.

LUDWIG — (repeats).  Faithful person...

ANNA — You're not the only one — 'faithful'.  So now I'm an orphan all around.  (Strictly).  Offending me is a sin!  Remember!  God will punish!

LUDWIG (after a pause). You are still hidden...

ANNA — And you ain't a 'soul to plow'.  Always so silent, silent... How to live safely with you.  Such is our love.

LUDWIG — Wrong?

ANNA (laughs cheerfully). Not wrong... No!

LUDWIG — But still love?  A kind of love in poetry?

ANNA — Yeah, just like in your Faust!

LUDWIG — (almost laughing) — Not in Faust, but in Faust. Faust ... and Marguerite.

ANNA (repeat quietly). Faust...and Marguerite. (smiled). Is it me — Marguerite?

LUDWIG — I ... Ja voll... (reads 'Faust' in German, then stops)

ANNA — More... Read more!  Laughing, crying.  Rumba rumbles. (Ludwig reads Faust louder and more joyfully.  He almost screams.  And Anna begins to repeat certain German words after him.  Louder ... Louder ... Louder — more and more joyful).

AUTHOR — On August 28, 1927, Ludwig Leve was arrested and deported to the city of Kandalaksha, where he stayed for seven years.  Anna wrote letters to him, sent parcels.  She waited.  He returned on an April morning in 1934.

ANNA — Go to sleep! Sleep... If you want... Sleep some more...

LUDWIG — And how long did I sleep? 

ANNA — Already the third day has gone. 

LUDWIG — And you never left?

ANNA — Thank God, I am writing a thesis.  It turned out so well, there was no need to run to the faculty.

LUDWIG (laughs softly). You?  Nyura?  Nyushenka ... And a thesis?  God! 

ANNA — (reads in German from Faust)

LUDWIG — Do you remember? Marguerite...

ANNA — Always surprised — how did I get such a pronunciation.

LUDWIG — They must know that you have a husband...

ANNA — Maybe they will send me to Germany!

LUDWIG — To Germany! God! What happiness! I know, I know, you will leave me now! Why do you need me! You are specialist! And who am I? Unemployed, suspicious type...

ANNA — (interrupting). So tell me, how was it?  In exile?

LUDWIG — (not immediately) — Normal.

ANNA — Well, what are you doing? 'It's normal, it's normal...' And when he arrived, 'It's normal.' And after he slept — all the same! 'Normal'!  (Suddenly)  Did you have any women there?

LUDWIG — (not immediately). This is not a topic for conversation.

ANNA — Between husband and wife?

LUDWIG — (firmly). Exactly! Between husband and wife...

ANNA — Of course, I got a job in the hospital.  Doctors are different.  They receive their lunches from the kitchen! (unexpectedly) Is she beautiful?  Prettier than me?!

LUDWIG — (calmly).  She is seventy-three years old.  And she walks with a cane.

ANNA — (in inertia of anger!) Ah-ah-ah...

LUDWIG — Why didn't you write to me that you had abandoned me?  I would understand.

ANNA — (almost calmly) Otherwise I wouldn't have been admitted to the university.

LUDWIG — You did the richt thing.

ANNA — What?

LUDWIG (bewildered). I misspelled the word.  Yes, yes... You did the right thing... You did it!

ANNA — (mimicking) 'Lala la...'

LUDWIG — (gets up) I 'll go.

ANNA — (amazed). Where? Everything in the house ... I bought everything...

LUDWIG — (not immediately) I think I will go.

ANNA — Forgive me. (Ludwig is silent) But you had your own life there, in Kandalaksha.  Probably all of yours, the former ones... In French, in German... Zirlich-Manirlich...

LUDWIG — I was a ward in the psychiatric hospital.

ANNA — What's with you?  What happened to you?  Why are you crying?!  Dear, dear... Man! (crying to herself).  God, what have I done!

LUDWIG — 'I did it ...' la la...

ANNA — 'La-la' ... Poor, poor mine... Quite grey-haired... Eyes hollowed.  Skin and bones.  And I... I'm a fool! Stupid!

LUDWIG — (calmly). You are not a fool. (After a pause). You are a living woman.  And I'm not asking you about your men.  I won't ask about anything now.

ANNA — You won't ask me?  Yes, Ludik?

LUDWIG — I won't ask anyone!  Those six years in a psychiatric hospital!  This is... This is...

ANNA — This is grief, right?

LUDWIG — No.  This is not grief! (Pause).  It's worse.  This is a sort of useless.

ANNA — (sadly and quietly). That's why you screamed like that in your sleep!


(Quietly, in the distance, a rumba from an absurd wedding plays. But even it does not drown out their suppressed, but clear tears. Tears — together).


AUTHOR — One great scientist said: 'Time makes people, not people time' (Probably, he was a kind person, because such a comprehensive indulgence can be given to people only after suffering very much... Seeing on earth a lot of baseness, recreancy, brokenness...)

Anna Pavlovna sued the neighbors for the two remaining rooms.  How she did it, only God knows.  But now they had a separate apartment with Leve.  In the late thirties — it was but a miracle!  She was a young specialist, her photograph appeared in the magazine 'USSR in Construction'.  Order bearer, sportswoman, parachutist, lecturer of women's clubs, teacher of the Military Chemical Academy.

And Ludwig Karlovich, having picked up newspapers from the mailbox in the morning, having bought half a dozen more at the Soyuzpechat kiosque on the corner, went to the warehouse and read them until dinner.  Anna Pavlovna was indignant, and he agreed with her, saying that he was a 'bad person.'

For the fifth time, Anna Pavlovna understood his confession and laughed — indeed, his whole life was now spent in the square.

ANNA (almost screaming). Coming home from work! My head is spinning!  You can barely drag your legs... And then the whole house is upside down!  What are these woods?

LUDWIG — Dinner is ready.  On the stove.

ANNA — Who needs this junk?

LUDWIG — This bureau stood in the reception room of Count Alexander Khristoforovich Benckendorff.

ANNA — You blurt it out somewhere else!  It's not enough for me to talk about my hubby!

LUDWIG — We are divorced.  I am not your husband.  I am your housekeeper...

ANNA — Throw it all to the trash!  Away from sin!

LUDWIG (calmly).  Never!

ANNA — Then I'll throw it away!

LUDWIG — O'er my dead body! (Laughs). 'O Jove, you're angry!'

ANNA — I'm not Jove!  I'm an assistant professor.

LUDWIG (laughing). 'Assistant-persistent'!

ANNA — Well, it's my fault!  Satisfied?  I scolded you selflessly for your idleness! (Darkly).  Do something useful!

LUDWIG — Have mercy, mother!  Cabinetmaker is one of the most revered professions in the world! (Laughs).  Oh-oh... You will still be proud of me.  Your Chernopiatov will be crawling on his knees here — so that I can fix his Pavlovian furniture! (Sincerely).  It is in a disgusting state!

ANNA — (not immediately).  Are you sure you can become a cabinetmaker?  Professional?  Your hand is very white!

LUDWIG — Me? (Pause). I didn’t notice... (Unexpectedly). But you became a university worker.  It was even more incredible!

ANNA — (arrogantly). Well, I'm not the same!  I'm still have my proletarian roots!  With my application...

LUDWIG (quietly). Makhnovist father.  Mother is the daughter of the fist...

ANNA (smartly). And a husband... (in a whisper). Former banker! (Not right away).  What is this — children's babble? Have you fallen into childhood?

LUDWIG — (after a long pause). Didn't you see the boy in the red shirt?  Well, in my former nursery.

ANNA — (quietly) And you ... You?

LUDWIG — (quietly) Yes...

ANNA (in a whisper). So you... saw him too? Ts-s-s... He's sleeping!

ANNA (getting up). I'll just look at him... (Opens the door) No one! (laughing uncertainly). Or maybe ... we imagined?

LUDWIG — Both? N-no! He must have run away to the Bauman Garden... Look out the window!  There's his red shirt.  It can be seen from afar!

ANNA — (not immediately).  Chernopiatov was arrested.

LUDWIG — {quietly).  'The vacancies are just open...' (Pause). For you (with a plea). No need!  Anya!  Stop it!  You can't walk on corpses!

ANNA (almost screaming). But we have a son!  Son!

LUDWIG — (carefully). By the way, what's his name? (Anna is silent). Valeri!  Pavel?  Karl?

ANNA — Yes, yes... Valeri!  Like Chkalov! (running around the apartment, screaming).

Valeri! Va-le-ri...

(Music...  A kind of angry impulse.  And in the silence the old voice)

LUDWIG — (to himself) He would be... Ten years old! And a half... Would he go to fourth grade?

(A calling mother’s voice is heard: 'Valeri? Where are you, Valera! Don’t hide from mum!'  After silence, festive New Year’s music that swooped in from afar, and then the chiming clock, the screams of the crowd — everything mute, from afar, again silence sets in.  A record creaks and two old voices sing a romance from the end of that century — Obukhov and Kozlovsky.

You can hear how the mighty, ancient front door swings, open with noise.  Elastic quick steps of a young, self-confident woman.  And finally, the flip of a switch and the voice of Anna Pavlovna.)

ANNA — Why are you sitting in the dark? One?

LUDWIG  — Happy New Year!  Anna!  Come to me, I'll kiss you...

ANNA — Happy New Year, dear. (Kisses her husband)  So where are your guests?

LUDWIG  — Our party is over.  Hour ago.  And my old bachelors departed for their lairs.

ANNA — How old are they? Anani Vikentievich... Yankel Peisakhovich. Kamzalov...

LUDWIG — (jokingly). A good deal could be put together. Like solitaire.  Denikin's staff captain.  Contractor of the Artillery Department.  And a former Tolstovian, and now the headman of the Baptist community! (Laughs).

ANNA — You, you're joking!

LUDWIG  — And don't forget about me!  Hereditary honorary citizen of the free city of Koenigsberg!  Member of the Board of Trustees of the Moscow Mariinsky Convent!  As they say now - 'the owner of factories, newspapers, steamships...'

ANNA  — Lord... Don't drink anymore!

LUDWIG — Today you can.

ANNA — Look at yourself from the side — in a dark room, alone... With a bottle...

LUDWIG — Not with a bottle, but with a damask.  With an old Dutch damask... Sit down next to me, professor!

ANNA (wearily). I am not a professor.

LUDWIG — This will come soon! You will be anything you'd like to wish...

ANNA — Everyone looked only at my dress!  You are a genius!

LUDWIG — I have long suspected some kind of genius in myself! But why would it wake up in my tailoring?! This is o'er any fantasy!

ANNA (laughs). Cabinetmaker, tailor, cook, furrier.  By the way, took a French magazine from the Makhovs.  There are absolutely amazing shoes!  Such boats!

LUDWIG (almost horrified). You want me to make your boots too!

ANNA (laughs). — You can everything! You have golden hands!

LUDWIG (quietly). I used to think... That I have a golden head!

ANNA (unexpectedly). What are these gifts? Railway? (Pause). To whom?

LUDWIG — You know.

ANNA — (begging). No need...

LUDWIG — We must!  Otherwise I'll go crazy.

ANNA — You... We... We should not allow ourselves.  This!

LUDWIG — (begging). I'm on my own money.  I earned them myself!

ANNA — I understand everything!  But you are dying.  Alone here, within these four walls.  Afraid of everyone and everything . . . Brilliant, smart, talented... My gentle one! Ludya... Ludya!  Let's come up with something! Eh?

LUDWIG — Well, I could go to work in the savings bank.  Perhaps ... and take it? A?

ANNA — Perhaps! Maybe... Here the holidays will pass. There will be a new year.  I'm so afraid of leap years.  Well, he has passed — the fortieth year.  Now ahead of the forty-first.  That is the year... Well, maybe something will happen in our life... Right! (Suddenly).  Why are you looking at me like that?

LUDWIG — What have you become... (Laughs).  Victorious woman!

ANNA (embraces him, kisses him, passionately). Ludya, Dudik! My dear! My joy, my sun... Will you forgive me everything? You forgiven everything, haven't you?

LUDWIG  — I forgave you. I'll forgive... Only he will not forgive.

ANNA Who? Chernopiatov?

LUDWIG  — What about Chernopiatov? He must have already been scattered to ashes... (Hardly). The son will not forgive!

ANNA (shouting). Stop doing that! Stop torturing me! You're crazy. You are a fiend! You need to go back.  In Kandalaksha.  To a psychiatrist!

LUDWIG (calmly). Quiet or you'll wake the boy.

(In response — only a strangled, feminine, hopeless groan. And music, which gradually becomes thunderous.)

It is hard to believe when they say that a Russian person is ready for war, that something great is happening in a person.  The next day, Ludwig Karlovich went to sign up as a volunteer, but instead of the war front he ended up in the KazLAG, as a German and a "former".  For two years he bombarded his superiors with requests for a front.  And — oh, a miracle! — in October 1942, just before the Battle of Stalingrad, he was sent to the front, fought for more than two years riding a battery of heavy guns and returned to Moscow with two stripes for wounds and three medals, of which one was the most glorious — with the medal 'For courage!'

Here you go... Whatever war does to people! Maybe all the energy accumulated over the years and years; pain, resentment,  virility broke through in the soul of this quietest person, and he became an ordinary hero, strong and enduring, a meek and courageous soldier. No one, it seems, would believe in such metamorphoses — except for one person. Except Anna.

(There are two voices in the night. Two happy voices).

ANNA — Come here... More! Come here... My sweet... My dear! Oh, kiss me again...

LUDWIG — Oh... (Laughs).  Have pity on me.  Although I am yesterday's soldier, I am an old man! Anya... Anya...

ANNA — Say affectionately — Nyusha! Nyurochka...

LUDWIG — (seriously). No — Anna, An-na! This is wonderful. It's like the sound of a bell. An-na... An-na... Do you hear?

ANNA — (simple). No, I don't!

LUDWIG — Oh, you're my funny one. What a lucky person I am! I had no idea how much I love you! After all, there was not a night, a day that I did not dream of you. I didn’t think, I didn’t remember... How you walk... Royally... Oh, you smile

ANNA — How angry am I?

LUDWIG — Royally! (kisses her). From people like you, empresses turned out...

ANNA — Katerina...

LUDWIG — No! She was German after all!

ANNA — So I am German... (Laughs). For my husband!

LUDWIG — No! You are Elizaveta Petrovna. Anna Ioannovna!

Anna — (quietly) Better Elizaveta... (quietly laughs happily) Here we have everything, like people do, and it turned out — my husband is at the front. The wife is evacuated. Son... (intermitedly)

LUDWIG (quietly). The son... is growing.  With Grandmother.

ANNA — (unkindly). No need!  Stop doing that...

LUDWIG — All right, I'll stop... (Silence).

ANNA — (not immediately).  Now you can even think about job. . . After all, a front-line soldier!

LUWIG — (softly). Then about this...

ANNA — What, then?

LUDWIG — Well, not now — at night.  Should I go to some personnel department? (Laughs).  Did your eyes squint a little?

ANNA — They say that a woman happens to be happy.

LUDWIG — Are you happy?

ANNA — Oh!

LUDWIG — Are you happy with me?  Or in evacuation — without me!

ANNA — Everything that was in the evacuation does not count!

LUDWIG — So, there was something after all?

ANNA — (jumps up). Phew — something to drink!  Now I would seem to have drunk a whole bucket.  You know, such well water.  To break your teeth! (Laughs).  Why are you looking at me like that?

LUDWIG — Wait, wait!  That's it... How wonderful the light falls on you! If only you could see!

ANNA — (laughs pleased). They told me — Rubens!

LUDWIG — (unexpectedly). If I could shoot you... It often happens now.

ANNA — And you shoot! (quiet). Maybe you'll be better?

LUDWIG — (not immediately).  I've already shot enough. For life! (quietly)  Come on...

ANNA — But ... Ludya! Ludik...

LUDWIG — (terribly).  Come to yourself! (Added clearly, but quietly).  The war is over.

(After a short but stormy musical pause, an amazing silence sets in. That silence, about which, probably, it was said — 'nothing sways in the field.'  Only the languor of the July noon ...  the whisper of leaves and the paired flight of swallows will flash.  And again silence, heat, languor...)

LUDWIG — (talks quietly, seriously, calmly ... almost happily).

'Sleep, Valerochka, sleep... You are overheated, probably, because of the sun.  And if you let me, I'll sit with you.  Let me just cover my back — anyway, the wind is dangerous for you. (Pause).  That's good. (Something quietly murmurs to himself). Our mother ... our sweet mother accepts exams at the institute in such heat.  Then she'll go to the department.  And you  know what time it is now... All kinds of struggle. with bad ideas, with cosmopolitanism. (Laughs softly.)  And you probably don't even know what it really is.  I would explain to you, but my explanations will probably be strange.  After all, I myself, to some
extent, if not a cosmopolitan... Something like that. Born in Warnem;nde, near Rostock. This is in Germany.  And studied either in St. Petersburg, or in Riga, or in Belgium, at the Catholic University of Leuven. (Laughs).  Almost like my last name.  Mine is not yours... Your last name, like our mother's, is Abrikosov.
So you'll be better off. You won't be asked again — both in the police and in queues, and in the hotel - 'How, how ... Leva? No, not Leva, but Leve.  And then there are so many different problems with ethnicity.  After all, I can also spell French — my grandfather was Levai, French surname, another grandfather is German. Both grandmothers are Jewish. (Chuckles).  And this is not the best entry in the passport now. (Not right away).  But what about the middle name?  But after all to you need to receive the passport only in the next year. (Quiet, distant music, somewhat reminiscent of rumba...) Lord!  How nice... Silence, village, sun, greenery all around.  And you are with me... (Barely audible).  Forever with me. (He paused).  And don't be mad at your mum! She sent us here.  It's always been good here.  I remember.  A long time ago... Wonderful people lived here when you weren't around yet.  And I have already worked here... By order of the government.  There is no need to condemn them — then almost all of them died.  And you and I are alive. (Laughs happy). And we have our mother.  She is a big person. She is a great person.  She saves us — hides us.  Yes, yes — even here, in Kandalaksha... Many miles from Moscow!  But she does this not only for herself, but also for us!  After all, if now someone finds out about us with you.  So where would we be?  Eh?  And our sweet mother.  She's the head of the department, isn't she?  Stalinist laureate!  She has a lot of enemies!  You know how she knows how to make them (laughs).  Well, right out of the blue! (Laughs).  And here we are, safely, everyone forgot about us.  You and I... (Chuckled) were simply crossed out from all lists.  Deleted from life.  But we are alive... My boy!  We are alive!  And we are together! (Suffocated from an attack of tears) and don't think about anything.  And I will read to you in German.  You remember how we agreed with you — you need to know languages ;— English and French well . . . And you hear German every day. So... Listen... After all, in a dream you also learn very well, even better than in reality.  Well, Goethe. — Faust.  Where are you and I were?  Yes, yes... Before the hero's monologue in the third act. (He reads at first quietly, then more and more meaningfully, more calmly, reads almost regally — as if his true, high spiritual part has never left the man.)

AUTHOR — Scientists say that a person has a sixfold margin of biological strength.  This means that he must live three hundred and fifty or four hundred years.  This is how the people of the Bible lived, according to this on of the books.  We do not even hope for such a life.  But sometimes it seems to us that such an endless life would be more a punishment for us than a joy.  And the fault is not earthquakes and hurricanes, not drought or volcanic eruptions.  And not even revolutions and famine, not wars and pestilence... But what we call so uncertainly — "human relations".  I don't know exactly when Ludwig Karlovich died... No, I don't know.  It seems that Anna Pavlovna outlived her husband by fifteen years.  But back in the mid-sixties, this elderly, intelligent couple could be met on Tverskoy Boulevard almost every fine day.  Many looked back at them.  Almost always in black loose clothes.  They seemed like people from another, bygone world.  But at the same time they looked like winners.  They went through a lot and a lot... They hardly spoke to each other, but even so it was clear that they were very close, very devoted to each other. 

LUDWIG — Forgive me, Anya.  I could give you so little in all our lives.

ANNA — You loved me.  What could be more?

LUDWIG — I promised to show you Paris, Italy ... London. And you and I didn’t go anywhere further than Kiev.

ANNA — Is that the point?

LUDWIG — And this too. (After a pause).  I have lived three lives.  Youth — in Europe, even before that war, then the first family, the first happiness, career wealth... And then — the third life.  It consisted only of you.  And you lived only the last one. With me.

ANNA — (not immediately). How do you know?

LUDWIG — I know.

ANNA (sharply). How do you know?  There was a career. Science... Fame.  Almost glory.  I have had many men.  Yes, yes... I was loved, and I loved.

LUDWIG — But you still came home.  To me...

ANNA — Yes ... And sometimes you turned away so as not to see my happy eyes.

LUDWIG — Or hateful?

ANNA — No! It just seemed to you. (Not right away).  You have always been everything to me, father and child.  And a husband.  And my heart.  You!  And only you...

LUDWIG — (after a pause) You have always been a cruel woman.  How many people have you... How many people have you crushed to step over.

ANNA — I had someone to protect.  And I don't regret anything.

LUDWIG — (not immediately). Even in the death of Chernopiatov.

ANNA (shuddering). He... Chernopiatov? ( Not immediately). He was my first love.

LUDWIG — (not immediately). And I always thought... That I was your first love?

ANNA — No... You were something else... (Quietly).  You and Valeri.

LUDWIG (sharply). Don't! . . We agreed with you... We are cured... Both... For a long time.

ANNA — (stubbornly) You! And our son! (pause) 'He wasn't there.' So what!? He was! Howled in our hearts. In our care... In each of us...

LUDWIG — Don't...

ANNA — No, he will come.  He will come later... (Laughs)  You see, I'm already starting to talk.  Like you always did...

LUDWIG — Like we are together. (Laughs).

ANNA — You see this lieutenant passing by.  Tall brunet... Could he be like that? Trully?  Or just yesterday I saw: graduate students from the GDR came to the Institute on exchange.  One of them... Well, you're just the spitting image of your youth.

LUDWIG — You didn't even see me when I was young!

ANNA — (not immediately). You forgave me everything! Who else on earth could understand me like that?  Even I never understood myself.

LUDWIG (quietly). Now you seem to understand...

Anna — Looks like...

LUDWIG — Forgive me... But a very long time ago.  When we first met.

ANNA — Don't!

LUDWIG — (persistently, but gently). It is necessary... When I,  generallly, was lost to the world ... for myself as a person.  I saw you!  I suddenly thought, but even a wolf cub can be tamed! 

ANNA (quietly) Worse.  She-wolf!

LUDWIG — Maybe... And if I can do it. If I am a man... Then she will become a person.  And then the whole life is no longer without meaning.  And not only mine!  In general, all life then makes sense.  And some extra meaning.  Yes!  If savagery becomes culture... If beast becomes huma... If deafness hears a melody...

ANNA — No more... I'm already old.  I also understand something.

LUDWIG (laughs). And what do you understand?

ANNA — I understand!

LUDWIG (persistently). So?  What?

ANNA — (not immediately). I once woke up at night and looked at your light and kind face... Such a childish face!  And I thought... (Sigh).  Is it really the fate of man to 'eat life'?  To eat life?  Bite?  Crack life?  Is all life really just a 'big eatery' ?

LUDWIG — (kisses her).  Anechka...

ANNA — No! Anna... (Through tears). Remember, you once said: 'Anna is like a bell!' An-na... An-na... An-na...'

LUDWIG — (quietly). Do you see him coming towards us?

ANNA Who? What happened to you! Man ... Man! Get a hold of yourself!

LUDWIG — Hush ... He's coming ... He's close ... Look at him.

Beautiful... Similar to you! He has your eyes... He is slender and bright, like a poplar.

Lord, it's Him.  Just look.  It's him... Our... Son!

(Short cry of an old woman... Ambulance siren... Resounding, choking beat and another heartbeat... Frequent, intermittent... Then the last sound is silence.  With distant music, with a soft female cry, with an almost inaudible distant good news.  And, almost like a mockery, suddenly surfaced, long forgotten by everyone on light, a 'rumba' is heard from the twenties, sunk into Lethe...l

AUTHOR — Anna Pavlovna for a long time — wayward, sharp, lost... She is always as if she were listening for that one voice to which she was more accustomed to than her own.  Her face was almost always preoccupied, as if she was deciding something very important for herself, to which she definitely had to give an answer.   Later, maybe even in another life.   We, the young, considered all this to be nonsense and caprices...  As I now understand, she didn’t really used to like us — some other faces stood before her eyes, another life that only flashed and, beckoning, disappeared, 'promising only a meeting ahead'.  Now I think it was she, and not us, who was right.  She paid so... much, paid with her whole life, in order to discern in the impenetrable fog of the wild age, in the loneliness of the fate of everyone, something truthful and reliable... What her strange companion revealed to her — her slave, her husband, her god.

And now both of them have been gone for many years, the bright face of their son, his gaze open to the world, it seems to me, more and more often emerges from the darkness, from dreams... From the very dumbness of our time.  And even sometimes it seems to flash in the evening crowd — either with a smile, or with hope, or with a promise that we will survive.   And we'll be saved.  Because we are not the first.  And we will not be the last.


transl. by Ed. Labintzeff