It s just one dried-up cow patty, our galaxy

To Michio Kaku
 
- Listen, Kozubay,no matter what physicists and astronomers say, but no one understands space better than the Kyrgyz.
- Where did you get such opinion, brother?
- Well,judge yourself. This James Webb Telescope, which was launched a year ago, discovered galaxies that have existed 13 billion years ago - from the very beginning of the Big Bang,when all this appeared. Astronomers and physicists used to think that galaxies were born gradually - the earliest or oldest of them formed two to three billion years after the Big Bang.
And what shew to us this space telescope now? It discovered many galaxies that appeared from the very beginning,when there were no stars, in theory.
- Too tricky to us, brother. Why did you go into this area at all? Better for us now look after our sheep and cows.
-- That's just the point,brother,the answers to all these questions were always known to us - those who graze sheep and cows.
--How it is?
- Well,judge yourself. Physicists have now come to the conclusion that, it turns out, there was no Big Bang at all - there was no beginning, you get it?
  --So what?
  --What does it mean that it has always been in space. Cows have always been grazed, or in their terms Dark Energy and Dark Matter, which make up 96 percent of everything. And a person can see with the help of the most modern devices only 4 percent - these same cakes which grazing cows lay down to soil from time to time.
- So what?
-Don't you guess it?  These very galaxies are in fact the  same cows cakes. I discovered this similarity from the very beginning, as soon as saw what our Milky Way looks like. The real cow cake,in shape,size and matter,your mother!
So why do people know so little about space? Because we only look and see these cakes and see them everywhere -- cow dungs.
And those who produce them, that is, cows - Dark energy and Dark matter - we do not see.
Well, this super-powerful telescope discovered the most distant galaxies  -- these  round shaped flat cow dungs, and now scientists are scratching their heads, where could they come from so far from us?
And there is nothing to puzzle. If you go on over these hills to the very  blue mountains, then you everywhere will find these cow cakes, galaxies. Cattle graze everywhere. And so it has always been. What else is there to puzzle over? And by the way, here is another confirmation of my theory. Recently, this same telescope discovered some giant wall of these galaxies at a distance of 2 billion years from us - and again the world is racking its brains over this crap. And there is nothing to think about?
-- And what is it?
- Well, many shepherds and cattlemen and their wives know and do this. They collect dried cows manure and store it in their barn. And some even collect fresh cakes and dry them, stuck  on the walls of sheds and barns.  So it is the same galactic structures, walls, fences! And man and mankind are so arranged that they see only these same cow cakes, and nothing more. Hence this paradox, when there are only flat cakes everywhere, and cows and shepherds and their houses and sheds and pastures - none of this is visible, as if they do not exist, and never have been.
--So in your opinion it turns out that space is like your pasture, where cows and sheep graze. And everything we see, stars, planets, galaxies, is just cow cakes?
-- Exactly. Everything talks and witnesses about it. These very cows, that is, creatures invisible to us - Dark Matter and Dark Energy - graze in the pastures of the universe, eat their grass there, and we see only these cakes of theirs and live in one of these billions cakes from the very beginning, came from this cosmic manure and will remain in it until the end of time.
- So, it turns out humanity is like worms and microbes that live in these dungs cakes.
--Exactly. We're all dung beetles crawling around in cow pats. More precisely, their larvae, which one day will acquire wings and fly across the pasture in search of other similar cakes to lay their eggs there.

Do you think they will give me a Nobel Prize - for this discovery? I should write a letter to Michio Kaku. I hope this physicist will understand me, especially since he has such a symbolic curious  surname. The most famous astrophysicist  and the master of stars poops and cakes.