Story 6. Where memory hides. Part 1

For a while, nothing happened. Except, that is, for the landscapes, which were breathtaking enough for anyone, including Muss and me.
 
We walked and walked, looking around, but felt absolutely no desire to turn and look back. 'Maybe there's something wrong with us,' a doubt crept into my mind. But Muss was completely calm and relaxed.
 
'If Ayane said the desire to look back would come, then it will. Don't worry,' he hastened to reassure me.
 
How he always knew what was going on in my head, I had no idea. So I decided to ask him. Looking around didn't stop us from talking, and listening to myself didn't seem to either. Why not ask?
 
Muss explained that since we were connected, he felt all my states as if they were his own. He didn't even have to do anything. It was like knowing something about yourself. As I understood it, the ability to tune into someone else is common to all living beings, and even more so for Guides. It's a tool honed by practice and constant attention. He constantly monitored the slightest internal changes. And he knew perfectly well which states were his own and which weren't. If any unusual or unfamiliar thoughts, feelings, or sensations wandered into him, he was always aware they weren't his. And finding out whose they were, it turned out, wasn't difficult. The thoughts, feelings, states, or moods of any creature are always, as it were, coloured by them. It's akin to a scent. So Muss was always, so to speak, sniffing the air to see what was floating around in it.)
 
'I wish I could do that too,' I said dreamily.
 
'Nothing could be easier,' said Muss. 'Try tuning into my state right now. We're friends. You like me, it won't be hard. You need to feel that warmth and affection you have for me, relax, stop thinking so hard, and let's see what comes to you.'
 
'Well, alright, I'll try,' I said uncertainly. 'What if I fail?'
 
'You won't fail. Use your feelings for me as a bridge. They'll lead you to my state. Just don't strain yourself. Imagine it's a game.'
 
'A game, a game… Okay, I'll try, why not? So many interesting things have happened to me lately that another new ability certainly wouldn't hurt,' I mused, gazing at a ridge of pearlescent clouds in the distance.
 
Then I tried to tune into my feelings for Muss.
 
'Hmm, interesting, how do I feel about Muss? Well, very fondly, of course! No doubt about that. But what does "fondly" mean?' I asked myself. 'It's as if we've known each other all our lives, like brother and sister. I can't even imagine how I lived without him before? Did I even?' I thought in surprise, walking along the path. And suddenly I caught myself thinking that I hadn't. Never! Maybe I hadn't known him, but I had definitely always known of his existence and our connection, all my life.
 
I glanced at Muss with interest. Was this his state now, or still mine? He seemed aware of my inner turmoil. He wrinkled his nose amusingly and said it was getting warmer, but it was still my state. I just wasn't used to being aware of all my impulses and sensations yet. But I was on the right track.
 
'Keep going, don't get distracted. And try to feel more, not think, as you're used to.'
 
Right, okay. Feel, feel… And then a huge, warm wave washed over me. I could actually see it as an amber, shimmering, luminous mass enveloping both Muss and me.
 
Suddenly, I realised that I truly had known Muss all my life. Not just this life, since I was born in our Dense World, but also some other lives (maybe before this one, or during it, though is that possible?) in some strange, yet achingly familiar places.
 
'Where was it? Where?' I racked my brains, but in vain. The more I tried to remember those places and what connected me to them, the more they faded and receded.
 
Then a calm certainty came over me that they hadn't retreated; it was simply not the time to delve into that now, as I had a specific task and needed to concentrate on it. I knew for sure that this state was one we shared with Muss. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Muss give a barely perceptible nod. Just as I was about to ask him, 'Well? Did it work?' he answered with a smile, not waiting for my question:
 
'It worked, it worked.) But I think it's time for us to turn around.'
 
Oh, right! I'd completely forgotten about that! What a scatterbrain!
 
And then I felt an irresistible urge to turn back and look at the house we'd come from. We turned. There was no sign of the house at all!
 
And yet not much time had passed. Besides, the area was open; even if we'd gone a very long way, we'd still be able to see it. But before us was an endless path stretching into a turquoise distance, winding among low hills covered in lush vegetation. And no house in sight! So there.
 
We exchanged a happy glance and, as if on cue, turned back – and voila, there was the gate! As if it had always been there.
 
At this, Muss couldn't help but burst out laughing.
 
'It has always been here! In this world, to move between different places, they mostly use doors and gates. And turning around is like a key to them. We either wind ourselves into the world's energy lines or unwind ourselves from them, and everything hidden becomes visible. Remember on Ayane and Kotess's balcony?'
 
'Uh-huh,' was all I could say, because I suddenly remembered that before I met Muss (that is, before what I had until recently considered our first meeting), I'd had dreams where I repeatedly performed this turning procedure, thus changing either the location or the very plot of the dream. Well, well! It seems I know much more than I'm used to thinking.
 
'Maybe, in light of this new information, this isn't even my first journey with Muss after all, eh?' I thought cheerfully. 'I wouldn't be surprised at anything anymore.'
 
Meanwhile, Muss touched my arm with a soft paw:
 
'Well, ready for adventures? Shall we go?'
 
'With you, to the ends of the earth, you know that,' I replied.
 
And we stepped through the gate.
 
---
 
'It's so good you're starting to remember,' said Muss, as we wandered through an incredibly beautiful, well-tended, but completely deserted garden. 'This will really help us in our search for Liata and her memory. Now you know the bonds that connect her and Shipunshsh. Poor thing! He's had a hard time. Almost like me, only you at least didn't lose your memory, yours was just buried very deep. Still. Just imagine, every time I came to you in a dream, we travelled together, and by morning you had completely forgotten everything. What was I to do? Just wait until I could come to you completely.'
 
'Listen, there's one thing I don't understand – how did I manage to forget everything? You, our travels… Now I remember it all perfectly. I remember that we all live simultaneously in different worlds, in varying degrees of manifestation, so to speak, with different tasks, even different destinies. And yet we all work together, meeting periodically on the border between sleep and waking to exchange information and coordinate our actions. Why didn't I remember any of this back home?'
 
'Well, you don't think your world is called Dense for nothing, do you? It became that way. Once upon a time, anyone could easily enter it, and just as easily go anywhere else from it. Why, whole settlements sometimes vanished from it and reappeared in other worlds. They even sometimes stayed to live there. Because, for example, they liked the colour of the sky better. But then the world began to harden. And it hardened so much that now you can only get there through dreams. Although even with dreams, strange things have been happening lately. That's why many of us are going there now. We have to help the world; it's having a hard time. So it called us.'
 
'My head is spinning from all this,' I said. 'On one hand, I understand everything perfectly, but on the other, like a fool, I keep repeating – can all this really be true? Imagine! Oh! And there are the swings, look!'
 
Here, Muss and I finally emerged from the fragrant thickets of some light azure plant and found ourselves in a clearing with a latticed gazebo and a view of the sea.
 
'Oh, how beautiful!' I exclaimed. 'So this is where we're supposed to swing until we forget about time, right?'
 
'Exactly! If only we could find something to eat first,' Muss said thoughtfully. 'It's been one and a half eternities since breakfast, although that lilac drink was really, really good! And nourishing too! Let's go see what we can find to eat! Then it wouldn't hurt to forget about time!'
 
And we set off in search of sustenance.
 
---
 
'My suddenly awakened dream intuition tells me we should look in the gazebo,' I reasoned as we walked. 'What do you think?'
 
'I like the idea. In the worst case, we can sit there and wait; maybe food will appear. Just think hard about what you'd like. Because cakes are all well and good, but definitely not enough!' Muss replied.
 
'Yes, I was just thinking that!' I agreed.
 
So we'd worked up quite an appetite. And there was the gazebo! With a table in it. Just as I'd thought.
 
'I think I'm starting to get how things work here. Or remember, which is also good,' I thought contentedly.
 
As we approached the gazebo, the outlines of crockery began to appear on the table. Soon a large pot with some delicious-smelling stew materialised. And plates with colourful pieces of something unknown.
 
'I hope this is edible,' I thought to Muss, afraid we might be overheard. 'I, for one, intend to eat it. You?'
 
'I'll eat it too!' Muss replied.
 
Encouraged by our conversation, we boldly approached the table.
 
'Thank you very much for your hospitality! And for the meal!' Muss said politely.
 
I looked at him in surprise – what was that for? There's no one here… is there?
 
The answer came as a quiet laugh, seemingly coming from everywhere at once, and a strange tickling sensation in my stomach. It felt as if the trees, bushes, plants in the garden, even the gazebo itself were laughing, and the laughter was causing a tickle inside me.
 
'Don't forget, this is a transitional world; everything here is alive and conscious. Just like everywhere else, really,' Muss whispered discreetly, giving me a meaningful look. I understood without words.
 
'Thank you very much for your hospitality and for the meal!' I said loudly.
 
The trees and bushes rustled even louder, and a light breeze gently tousled my fringe. And I knew our thanks had been accepted. Not only could we now enjoy the food in peace, but we were also under the protection of this wonderful place.
 
The food was delicious! I had no idea what any of it was made from, but if I had to compare it to something, I'd say we were eating a stew made from some unusual purple mushrooms, bright orange potatoes, and greenish pieces of "meat" (probably from a "green beast" unknown to science), seasoned with local, indescribable herbs and something else vaguely familiar – dreamy ginger, that's it! Well, you'll have to figure out what that tasted like for yourselves! I've described it as best I can.
 
Muss laughed when he heard my thoughts about the "green beast". It turned out to be some kind of fruit, too. They don't eat animals here. They don't even eat fruit without asking the fruit's permission. They wouldn't eat without it. The very air here is so fragrant, rich, and nourishing that the locals have no need to eat anyone or anything. But they make an exception for travellers like Muss and me, treating us to what we need, taking local conditions into account. If I need, say, meat or mushrooms with potatoes – here you are, dear guests, fruits that taste like meat, and fruits that taste like mushrooms and potatoes.
 
'Turn around and see that tree with the reddish leaves? It grew those fruits for you and is treating you now,' a voice resounded in my head. And it definitely wasn't Muss.
 
'So the trees' laughter wasn't my imagination, was it?' I asked the voice.
 
The voice laughed crystal-clear, and again the laughter echoed as a tickle in some strange part of me that I, out of habit, took for my stomach.
 
'Nothing is anyone's imagination, my child,' said the voice. 'Everything that is perceived and conscious exists. The only question is where and in what form.'
 
'Thank you for the explanation,' I said politely out loud. For some reason, I absorbed this information instantly. I'd always felt that this was exactly how things were.
 
'And what should we do now?' I asked, hoping for a continuation of the conversation.
 
'Nothing. Walk, rest, swing on the swings as you planned. The adventure will find you by itself,' the voice replied.
 
'Thank you! That's exactly what we'll do!'
 
And Muss and I went to explore the garden.