Рецензии на произведение «Aiko. The stories she told»
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Рецензия на «Aiko. The stories she told» (Динозавр Дэнвер)
Major hi!
I checked out your story and it seems to me that every part was cool, and everything was interesting. I noticed that the girl that told the stories is a little weird. I mean, she is falling in love and the other day rejects every boy that she loves, and it is repeating on every part. Is she Japanese, Korean, Chinese or what? It occurred to me from that name of her. By the way she travels a lot. And the figures that she meets are from random countries.
First section of story was laughable. She never shies? I think that this is a different type of offering sexual intercourse. If somebody said that to me so frankly I easily thought that person is crazy! Aesthetically unacceptable but really funny.
In the second part at later in restaurant I think that she is jeering with that Chinese guy because of she already gave him the cash. I remarked that she is kind too, in spite of weirdness.
Third was exciting too. She wants to embarrass that half Turkish half Indian man by saying him that he maybe just a virgin because of he is vegetarian. It is strange that the guy didn't eat anything that she offered. There was nothing except meat in the menu? Although spaghetti, salad or that kind of meal, etceteras?
Forth was a beautiful part. I was touched from reading the lines the she cannot cry… It appears to be a difficult situation; ad interim (in the meantime) it slightly proves that she doesn't love him. She just loves the kiss, that “chocolate” smack on the lips. In the end I just didn't understand the last lines. What it means: “No I can't ... you have this stomach now and you don't look the same as I saw you the last time.”? What is that stomach word, and why she used that?
For conclusion I want to notice, that the story has a little errors, rather some symbols are absent. Some hyphens are missing. If you want you can edit it.
So, I can finally say, that it was fine and enjoyable, thanks a lot. By reading it I remember the short stories that I read in primary and secondary school.
Minor goodbye…
Мухаммет Агаев 09.03.2012 04:13 • Заявить о нарушении
Major hi!
I checked out your story and it seems to me that every part was cool, and everything was interesting. I noticed that the girl that told the stories is a little weird. I mean, she is falling in love and the other day rejects every boy that she loves, and it is repeating on every part. Is she Japanese, Korean, Chinese or what? It occurred to me from that name of her. By the way she travels a lot. And the figures that she meets are from random countries.
First section of story was laughable. She never shies? I think that this is a different type of offering sexual intercourse. If somebody said that to me so frankly I easily thought that person is crazy! Aesthetically unacceptable but really funny.
In the second part at later in restaurant I think that she is jeering with that Chinese guy because of she already gave him the cash. I remarked that she is kind too, in spite of weirdness.
Third was exciting too. She wants to embarrass that half Turkish half Indian man by saying him that he maybe just a virgin because of he is vegetarian. It is strange that the guy didn't eat anything that she offered. There was nothing except meat in the menu? Although spaghetti, salad or that kind of meal, etceteras?
Forth was a beautiful part. I was touched from reading the lines the she cannot cry… It appears to be a difficult situation; ad interim (in the meantime) it slightly proves that she doesn't love him. She just loves the kiss, that “chocolate” smack on the lips. In the end I just didn't understand the last lines. What it means: “No I can't ... you have this stomach now and you don't look the same as I saw you the last time.”? What is that stomach word, and why she used that?
For conclusion I want to notice, that the story has a little errors, rather some symbols are absent. Some hyphens are missing. If you want you can edit it.
So, I can finally say, that it was fine and enjoyable, thanks a lot. By reading it I remember the short stories that I read in primary and secondary school.
Minor goodbye…
Мухаммет Агаев 09.03.2012 04:13 • Заявить о нарушении
hey thanks for the feedback. glad you liked it.
there are no errors buddy. i wrote it to be read nice and easy. if you check your feedback you' ll find many more errors. no offense.
stomach word... :
well what she meant was that usual belly that most men have after 30.
when she was telling me all that she used the word "stomach" that's why i left it.
you r right 'though the girl is amazingly weird. all her stories are truth. she's probably one of the strongest people i've ever met.
Динозавр Дэнвер 18.03.2012 18:40 Заявить о нарушении
there are no errors buddy. i wrote it to be read nice and easy. if you check your feedback you' ll find many more errors. no offense.
stomach word... :
well what she meant was that usual belly that most men have after 30.
when she was telling me all that she used the word "stomach" that's why i left it.
you r right 'though the girl is amazingly weird. all her stories are truth. she's probably one of the strongest people i've ever met.
Динозавр Дэнвер 18.03.2012 18:40 Заявить о нарушении
btw i found it quite ironic that yours: "For conclusion I want to notice, that the story has a little errors, rather some symbols are absent."
full of grammar, style and other errors. u just cant tlk or write like that. no offense 'though.
i just posted new piece "The consequence of setting the birds free from cages in the previous life."
if you have time
Динозавр Дэнвер 18.03.2012 19:24 Заявить о нарушении
full of grammar, style and other errors. u just cant tlk or write like that. no offense 'though.
i just posted new piece "The consequence of setting the birds free from cages in the previous life."
if you have time
Динозавр Дэнвер 18.03.2012 19:24 Заявить о нарушении
yeah, thanx man for response.
yes, it could be many errors in my review too... :) i dunno!
i just wanted to mean that i like just clean editing,
nothing more. i don't pretend to correct the grammar, coz'
i don't know it well hundred percents .
i will check out ur new publication later.
Мухаммет Агаев 18.03.2012 20:13 Заявить о нарушении
yes, it could be many errors in my review too... :) i dunno!
i just wanted to mean that i like just clean editing,
nothing more. i don't pretend to correct the grammar, coz'
i don't know it well hundred percents .
i will check out ur new publication later.
Мухаммет Агаев 18.03.2012 20:13 Заявить о нарушении
Рецензия на «Aiko. The stories she told» (Динозавр Дэнвер)
Good story.I really enjoy to read it.Thank you.
Good Luck to your creation.
Лестат Лионкур 22.08.2011 15:30 • Заявить о нарушении
Good story.I really enjoy to read it.Thank you.
Good Luck to your creation.
Лестат Лионкур 22.08.2011 15:30 • Заявить о нарушении
Рецензия на «Aiko. The stories she told» (Динозавр Дэнвер)
I Really, really like it!!!!!!!!!!!
Ваш Жук.
...\ \ \
:0))))))
.../ / /
Жук Долгоносик 03.08.2011 18:58 • Заявить о нарушении
I Really, really like it!!!!!!!!!!!
Ваш Жук.
...\ \ \
:0))))))
.../ / /
Жук Долгоносик 03.08.2011 18:58 • Заявить о нарушении
Рецензия на «Aiko. The stories she told» (Динозавр Дэнвер)
Дочла до супермена, завтра вернусь)
ибо клево)
спасибо!
Анжелика Стар 02.08.2011 18:58 • Заявить о нарушении
Дочла до супермена, завтра вернусь)
ибо клево)
спасибо!
Анжелика Стар 02.08.2011 18:58 • Заявить о нарушении
дочитав до конца поняла, что хочется еще!!!
в общем, мне понравилось) правда, не очень понимаю, чем именно - ну инглиш, ну диалоги прикольные, ага.. но не в этом дело. Просто ПРОСТО все и как-то... без особых заморочек) хотя описанные жизненные сюжеты могут восприниматься по-разному (в т.ч., сложно)
в общем, я внутри себя определила жанр как близкое восприятие реальности, отраженное в коротеньких историях (милая девушка эта Айко, видимо))
Извините, что не рецензия, но на мой скромный взгляд такие вещи и нельзя рецензировать - они в принципе под это не предназначены))Ну, и сорри, что по-русски - у меня что-то с английской раскладкой клавы происходит странное, к айтистам по этому поводу никак не доберусь)))
Успехов!
С теплом, Лика.
Анжелика Стар 03.08.2011 18:30 Заявить о нарушении
в общем, мне понравилось) правда, не очень понимаю, чем именно - ну инглиш, ну диалоги прикольные, ага.. но не в этом дело. Просто ПРОСТО все и как-то... без особых заморочек) хотя описанные жизненные сюжеты могут восприниматься по-разному (в т.ч., сложно)
в общем, я внутри себя определила жанр как близкое восприятие реальности, отраженное в коротеньких историях (милая девушка эта Айко, видимо))
Извините, что не рецензия, но на мой скромный взгляд такие вещи и нельзя рецензировать - они в принципе под это не предназначены))Ну, и сорри, что по-русски - у меня что-то с английской раскладкой клавы происходит странное, к айтистам по этому поводу никак не доберусь)))
Успехов!
С теплом, Лика.
Анжелика Стар 03.08.2011 18:30 Заявить о нарушении
am so glad you liked it :))) she told me all those stories over coffees. i tried to recreate the way she told them. i mean the manner of her telling me all that. i think i achieved it. 'coz i see you got the point. when she was talking it was addictive... :) i never wanted to write down anything as much as her stories. i was running home to get it down as quick as possible :) there's more.i mean she told me more. i just need some time to recall and write them down
Динозавр Дэнвер 03.08.2011 20:15 Заявить о нарушении
Динозавр Дэнвер 03.08.2011 20:15 Заявить о нарушении
Good luck, it really means a lot... I mean, when you meet somebody able to speak so attractive to make you wanna write down this right now) I know this feeling very well...
Анжелика Стар 03.08.2011 22:46 Заявить о нарушении
Анжелика Стар 03.08.2011 22:46 Заявить о нарушении
Рецензия на «Aiko. The stories she told» (Динозавр Дэнвер)
These vignettes have some really funny and unexpected twists.
"I was just thinking… to ask you if you can be my sperm donor." Excellent!
I remember there was a French movie where at some point the main character, a woman in her 30s, approaches a stranger at a buffet and asks him if he'd like to have children with her.
"Go! You need to cry. " Nice!
-Arkady
Аркадий Герштейн 02.08.2011 01:28 • Заявить о нарушении
These vignettes have some really funny and unexpected twists.
"I was just thinking… to ask you if you can be my sperm donor." Excellent!
I remember there was a French movie where at some point the main character, a woman in her 30s, approaches a stranger at a buffet and asks him if he'd like to have children with her.
"Go! You need to cry. " Nice!
-Arkady
Аркадий Герштейн 02.08.2011 01:28 • Заявить о нарушении
yeah. i wrote those down while still under the impression from her. quick and simple. was too scared to forget the details. all those are the real stories she told me over coffee. i was really taken aback with her simple and brave perception of the reality. i was dumbstruck with her ways of thinking and dealing with things.
thank you for taking your time to read it :)
Динозавр Дэнвер 02.08.2011 01:49 Заявить о нарушении
thank you for taking your time to read it :)
Динозавр Дэнвер 02.08.2011 01:49 Заявить о нарушении